Anxiety Attacks and Panic Attacks

There will come a time where we reach a breaking point that drives us into a state of madness or a loss of control. When that moment happens, we enter a moment where we psychologically break down and in worse cases, experience body pains and anguish that drive us over the edge. Such attacks can last from a few minutes to even up to a half hour or longer. When faced with these moments of vulnerability and weakness, we are powerless to do anything about it. While I don't have any helpful advice, I at least want to discuss this matter with you all.

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Anxiety Attacks and Panic Attacks

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Though anxiety attacks and panic attacks seem the same, they are actually two different, yet similar things. Such moments in life can lead us to feeling broken down and weak. How we handle ourselves despite these moments can help determine whether or not we get through these attacks quickly or over time.

An anxiety attack stems from a brief moment that makes someone break down physically and mentally. An anxiety attack can be something triggered inside of us. These attacks can make anyone feel broken down and rendered helpless. People who suffer from anxiety may have a moment where are unable to perform and focus. The height of anxiety can come in the form of an anxiety attack. Certain techniques can help to ease anxiety attacks before they get potentially worse.

A panic attack, however, can be more serious. Panic attacks happen in much the same way as anxiety attacks, but effects such as nausea, shortness of breath, sweating, and more can result from a moment that brings fear. Panic attacks can happen without any trigger or warning. It is almost as if the mind decides when to get someone in fight-or-flight mode.

Either of these moments can make all of us be vulnerable at any given moment. At worst, having these attacks can lead to us being in an unstable condition or even lead us to hurt (or even kill) ourselves or others. This is very much a potentially serious situation that needs to be addressed.

Triggers of Anxiety Attacks and Panic Attacks.

Some people develop these triggers based on what is going on in their lives, certain mindsets people have, pressure to perform, and things of that nature. When there is a moment that brings us to insanity, we often act in ways that bring us down. Two serious triggers can also include not knowing what to think anymore or fear of impending doom. Someone may also have these attacks in the wake of feeling like you let a loved one down. In the wake of the COVID-19/Coronavirus pandemic, such mental issues can also form from all of the restrictions and such from this pandemic.

In these cases, it is important to try to recognize these triggers and try to find a way to restore control in the event of such attacks.

Treatment for Anxiety Attacks and Panic Attacks.

Self-treating anxiety attacks and panic attacks can be difficult. What you can you is practice breathing exercises, eat food or drink water. You may want to pull over if you are operating a vehicle and experience an anxiety attack or a panic attack. If someone of legal age is with you as you operate a vehicle, have that person take over duties. If you can and if you are able to, you may even exercise to try to bring yourself together better.

If panic attacks happen, medicine may be taken to lessen the effects of whatever is causing the panic attack. If you fear you may have panic disorder, you may want to consult with your doctor, as you may be facing serious physical and mental breakdown. Medicine can help to ensure your body and your mind remain intact.

It may also help to consult a psychotherapist for your anxiety or panic issues. See if you can schedule sessions to talk out your issues with a psychotherapist or any other mental health professional.

The most important thing to remember is that you will get through most any anxiety attack or panic attack. It is very unlikely one will die from an anxiety attack or a panic attack.


Let me try to offer Final Thoughts.

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Panic Attacks and Anxiety Attacks: Final Thoughts

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Life is tough as it is. Having to deal with panic attacks and anxiety attacks is equally tough. We all have our moments where panic or anxiety strikes us. Whether they last for a few minutes or over an hour, they do put an impact on our mental well-being. If you suffer from panic disorder (or even anxiety disorder), you may want to meet with your doctor to possibly get some medication to treat your disorder. The most important thing to remember is that you can't die from these attacks. You will get through anxiety attacks and panic attacks. Just be sure to take it easy and seek help when you can.





When I post topics like this, either they are based on thoughts of mine or on recent experiences in my life. Even if I don't go into details about most personal issues, I do have my fair share of issues. I want to try to help anyone who reads my blog posts. Hopefully I have helped someone through the means of blogging. If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

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Minimalism

Minimalism is about less is more. Minimalism involves downsizing. The idea is to live your best life having as little as possible. Can you live your best life without having a whole lot? This "John's Life Space" post involves minimalism. I will even share my own insights towards developing this mindset. I am not here to convince you to live minimalist, but I am providing insight on minimalism if you are considering living a minimalist lifestyle or want some insight on minimalism.

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Minimalism

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In most cases, having so little is usually grounds for having sympathy for others. It makes people want to pour into their resources and try to help people whom they feel are struggling in life. However, minimalism is not like that. Minimalism is about having so few resources yet still living a perfectly fine life.

We have grown as a culture to where having a big living space, having a significant other, and establishing a family makes someone a success in society. When someone lives with so less, some people think they are failures and probably wished they would live the lives of what society deems successful. Some people who live a minimalist lifestyle have all they need and do not have to have loads of money and resources to be happy. It is because some people make changes to themselves and their lives to live happily while not having the best of everything. Such people realize what makes them happy, and they don't rely on having a materialistic mindset to be happy.

When someone does not have all kinds of goods that give status, does it mean someone simply is not successful? Absolutely not. I can speak from personal experience. I honestly never felt bad because I wasn't wearing Nike sneakers or have a Starter jacket unlike other school students. I did not feel required to have what everyone else had in order to feel happy. I was okay having knock-off goods. At least I had certain goods. As I look at the idea of minimalism, I would be greatly served having some of the cheapest material as long as it lasted. I didn't care if I wasn't wearing Nike sneakers or have a Starter jacket. At least I had clothes.

NOTE: Now before I go into further detail, I want to advise everyone that living a minimalist lifestyle does NOT mean people are failures. Minimalist people are not those who failed to live the American dream (at least here in the United States of America). I am not suggesting minimalist types need help. I am just here to discuss minimalist culture.

Why Minimalism?

I will give you a lot of thoughts about minimalism to help prove my points on minimalism. Check it...

Someone would want to imagine what the big deal is with minimalism. Well for a lot of people, having the best of everything does not equate to happiness. When you really think about it, a lot of things we are blessed with or have are not exactly REQUIRED to live our best lives. Some things are almost merely non-essential to our survival. We don't care about that often times, but it is true.

Minimalism can pertain to not being flashy or boisterous. Would you rather drive a basic economy car all in stock form, or would you drive an economy car that has flashy graphics and various aesthetic arrangements (such as body kits, spoilers, etc.)? To the minimalist, an economy car is all someone needs. A minimalist is not at all concerned about being under pressure to the better furnishings to compete with other people. A minimalist may also prefer having bland-looking resources rather than flashy look-at-me resources.

As a sometimes fashion/beauty blogger (PLUG: Visit my fashion/beauty blog! Here: StyleSpace, by John B. Marine :) ), I hear of fashionistas who have a capsule wardrobe to express minimalism. This is where fashionable types get rid of clothes they don't really need or like much and instead stick with favorites. Fashionable types still want a decent wardrobe, but they want to do so without having to shop for new clothes all the time. So a minimalist in this regard will stick to a certain set wardrobe.

Believe it or not, long before I considered the layout of my blogs and some of my other social media material, I had minimalism in mind. I feel I can market myself without having a lot of fancy things. I am proud to have online material that are not filled with bloated nonsense. I also believe in minimalism when I do my videos online. I never had the best of the best, yet I made the most of what little I have. A fancy looking blog will get more attention than a bland one, but I always believed in quality over quantity.

Hopefully this section gives you some ideas on how a minimalist may think.

Minimalism Inspiration: Teemaree.

I want to offer a real example to help express the concept of minimalism. Teemaree, once a veteran of various forms of entertainment as well as being a spokeswoman, had achieved loads of success. She was also one of my favorite go-go dancers. She even spearheaded a first-of-its-kind reality show about the go-go dancing lifestyle. One would think someone like Teemaree is head and shoulders above her peers with this much success. Well, Teemaree admits she was mostly trapped and needed guidance. So what she did was a lot of deep thinking and faith. Today, Teemaree is a life coach, author, and creator of "Transform With Teemaree," "Invite God In," and "ALLSWELL Lifestyle." Her life coaching is a mix of offering life advice as well as providing religious insight. Speaking of Teemaree's insight, let me share this with you:


^ Who Is Teemaree?

Teemaree isn't the only example of minimalist lifestyle. She is the best example to me to discuss minimalism that I can provide. I am using Teemaree as an example to help set up discussion minimalism using a real-life example.

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Minimalism: How to Start?

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Minimalism is not something that can be easily implemented. I do not know all of the nuances of minimalism, but I may help you get started. I will share some of my own minimalist insights and thoughts to help give you some inspiration if you want to take on a minimalist lifestyle. Follow my lead...

Minimalism: What Do You Need?

The first thing to consider about minimalism is to think about what you have and what you need. Especially if you are going to live "off the grid," you have to seriously consider what things are important to you in the moment. You will have to learn to sacrifice some comforts in trying to live the minimalist life you wish to live.

If I lived as a minimalist, I am very involved in technology. So what I would need is powerful WiFi Internet. I want to hold onto my two TVs, my HDTV monitor, my printer, and my Chromebook. I may even want to go from a PC to a decent-spec laptop. If I had the money, I'd invest in an HP laptop that costs around $500 USD (or maybe $600 USD) that has better specifications than my 2014-ish budget PC. A lot of space on my desktop would be gone, and I could use it around the house even if power goes out. As a gamer, I want to hold onto my systems. I don't need a gaming PC when I can do just fine with a simple PC or laptop that can still play a good amount of games while also serving as my personal PC/laptop when not gaming. I would want to cook with a microwave and an air fryer. I would want a place with decent lighting. I feel lighting lightens my mood.

Most important about minimalism is making money. You need to find some sort of revenue stream or grind to stay financially afloat. There isn't much I do to generate income. So in this regard, I would struggle unless I had some proper form of making money.

You also must consider utilities. If you can invest in solar power, it would be cleaner for the environment and possibly even energy efficient. You also need decent plumbing to handle things like taking baths and showers as well as washing dishes. If you plan on getting into farming, you certainly need to consider decent utilities for planting gardens and such.

Minimalism can be a challenge if you have a significant other and/or a family. Be mindful of needs for you as a couple and in maintaining a family when being minimalist. You have to account for taking care of your lover/spouse in addition to your family should you choose to live as a minimalist couple or as a minimalist family.

These are just a number of things to think about when wanting to think minimalist.

Minimalism: Where Would You Live?

Do you prefer living within the big city, living in the suburbs of a major city, or out in the country? Do you even want to live in your current state or country or move elsewhere? You want to be able to live in a place where you can comfortably live your life. The popularity of tiny houses these days make for a unique challenge of trying to live without having to pay high mortgage rates. You would be surprised at how some people maximize their lives living minimalist style. If you do think about the tiny house lifestyle or convert a van or bus into a home, that is something else to consider your minimalist lifestyle in.

I have seen people live in places ranging from tiny homes to vehicles converted into homes. This even includes people who have trailer homes. If I had one such home, I kind of would want a two-story home to possibly enjoy great views and maybe even sit on the balcony outside. Because I am so much of a city person, I feel an affordable housing option within an uptown setting or downtown setting would be the best for me. I wouldn't want to shy too far away from family and friends here in Houston. Look around on various tiny home retailers and builders to think about your minimalist lifestyle.

Minimalism: Sacrifices.

Just like almost anything in life, you have to learn to make sacrifices. A lot of the luxuries you are accustomed to can be given up to live the minimalist lifestyle. Even though air conditioning seems necessary, it is actually a luxury. Living here in Texas, I can't afford to sweat in all of this Texas heat! So I would need a great solution for air conditioning.

If you are the materialistic type, you have to realize some goods you enjoy aren't always goods you NEED. Fashionistas- that means you can do without Louboutin pumps, Michael Kors handbags, Chanel espadrilles, and various other luxury goods.

Most importantly, the biggest move you can make in adopting minimalism is to drop your materialistic lifestyle. Minimalism forces you to think less about owning everything and only focus on essentials. You can live better by understanding the essentials rather than feel like you need material goods to be happy. I will leave this discussion with a little quote:

"You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"

-Steven Wright

I want to present some Final Thoughts on this topic to close out my minimalism discussion. Please look at the next section.

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Minimalism: Final Thoughts

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Minimalism is about living your best life having only so many resources. Minimalists shouldn't be seen as those who fail in life; instead, minimalists are more concerned with making the most out of live by having the least of resources. Do not think a minimalist has given up on life or should be living a luxurious lifestyle. In fact, a lot of minimalist types have all they need to live a great life. They just do not need status symbols to prove their worth to the world. They also do not need status symbols to be happy with their lives.

A minimalist does not need help; minimalists just choose to live their lives without many of the luxuries many of us consider essential. While minimalists try to live with less, they don't need help or need to get psychological help. If you are a minimalist, you don't need a mansion, expensive cars, fancy gadgets, and the like to live happily. You live on bare essentials. Minimalism allows you to focus on more important things without being bombarded with many [usually unnecessary] things.

If you do choose to live a minimalist life, you need to plan carefully. Think about all of your immediate needs and wants. It is not easy to live a minimalist lifestyle without actually planning ahead. Be prepared to make sacrifices and let go of things you don't think are essential to you. Adjusting from normal life to minimalist life will NOT be an easy transition. However, moving to minimalism or tiny living is possible and doable.

Minimalists have not given up on life or need help; they just are living with as few resources as possible based on their needs. Not everyone is successful with the amount of money they have or the goods they own. They don't need outside help or sympathy for living a simple lifestyle devoid of status symbols. Minimalists just simply make "less is more" work. When you think about it, we do not need too much to live our best lives and to be happy. If we were not so fixated on having certain goods and resources to be happy, life can be much more enjoyable than what many of us make it out to be. Minimalists should be commended for helping a lot of us realize this about life in this regard. So if you are considering going minimalist, good for you! Minimalism is the best way to admire and appreciate what it really takes to live happily and freely.

Extra Resources.

I mentioned Teemaree earlier. If you are interested in learning more about Teemaree in regards to minimalism and minimalistic living, please visit her website at teemaree.com, and (optional) tell her John Marine sent you! :) You may also visit Teemaree's YouTube channel for more advice and insight.


That was really the only resource I can provide. I may open up a section regarding living different lifestyles in my "Helpful Resources" page. I hope you found something useful with this blog post.





That is all for this blog post. If you want to discuss, here is my question for you:

Would you consider living a minimalist lifestyle? Could you survive as a minimalist?

If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my JohnMarineDesigns Weebly site, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin! Let's connect:
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Making the Conversation: Youth Relationships and Intimacy

WARNING: The following topic may not be suitable for all audiences. Due to the subject matter of this topic, viewer discretion is advised. Parents of younger children will need to restrict or limit younger viewers from viewing this material. Otherwise, you are reading this material at your own risk.

No matter what age your children are, they will always be your babies, your precious, your... whatever terms of endearment. There will be a time where your little ones won't be so little. They will get into grown-up things. Some things grown-ups get involved in are sex and relationships. Making this discussion regarding both matters is not an easy one to start. It can be tough to try to start such a conversation or discuss these things properly to someone still quite young. So is there anything you can do to properly discuss sex and relationships to youth? I will try to explain in this blog post.

Before I Begin...

This blog post's suggested audience is with parents. I make a lot of references to children and youth, but this post was meant for parents more than children and youth.

About the Label: Making the Conversation

As it is important to generate needed conversations about things, it can be tough to try to properly get conversations going. This label helps to get a basis of conversation going towards any number of issues that need to be discussed.

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Making the Conversation: Youth Relationships and Intimacy

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The basic response some parents would make is that children and teens are too young to think about sex and relationships, and children should not be thinking about these things while they are still young. However, there will come a time where these things will cross the minds of youth. Youth should be equipped with enough information and advice to see them through something like intimacy and relationships.

School prepares children for life and educates them on various matters. Some things outside of what is taught in school can only properly be taught by parents. Two such matters involve intimacy and relationships. While a parent can talk to children one-to-one regarding some life issues, it is best to hold a discussion speaking on youth's level. A parent has to try to explain things on a child's level while not overwhelming them with thoughts.

Intimacy and relationships are two things that will be fresh in the minds of youth as they grow older, so they shouldn't be overlooked when a young person has thoughts and concerns regarding such matters. A young person may choose to marry someone. If indeed someone wants to get married, that involves getting into relationships. If someone wants to start a family, that means a young person wants to get involved in having sex (or a much safer option- adopting children). Do not put these things aside- address them for when curiosity looms. That is the purpose of my discussion of intimacy and relationships with youth.

Primary Considerations.

Just as with any topic matter, the primary consideration is to be attentive both in questions being asked as well as in trying to answer properly. Intimacy and relationships are not easy matters to discuss; however, they are not completely taboo. Being able to address any sort of concerns in an efficient matter helps to alleviate some of the process of gaining a general understanding.

Discussing Relationships With Youth.

Relationships are always a matter worth discussing even if they don't involve intimacy or romance. Relationships can range from innocent love to deeply involved relationships. Being involved in relationships shouldn't go to the level where it interferes with or mitigates with trying to get a quality education. Again- while relationships of many kinds are a perfectly fine topic to discuss,

If you are a parent who had to deal with deceased lovers or being in and out of relationships, while it is tough to bring up those matters, it is recommended to discuss when relationships go wrong and how to deal with those things when love goes wrong. If you were possibly a player in relationships, be sure to discuss trying to find love without being a player or without trying to get up hopes of a relationship with someone only to crush those dreams. Even tougher to discuss is domestic abuse. Domestic abuse remains a hot-button issue in today's society. Hopefully your children will not be involved with any issues regarding domestic abuse or sexual abuse, but it is okay to discuss these matters in addition to discussing when love goes wrong.

Discussing Intimacy With Youth.

Intimacy regards a number of issues which most youth may not easily grasp right away. Intimacy itself is not a bad thing to discuss, but it does play a role in most relationships. Intimacy can entail matters of libido (sexual desire) and can even delve into pregnancy. As is the case regarding getting intimate with others, there is also the possibility of transmitting STDs (sexually-transmitted diseases). If intimacy is to be practiced, youth must learn about safe sex or even practice abstinence.

If young ones are interested in intimacy, it is best to try to explain intimacy in an understandable and non-destructive manner. Do not allow youth to go on some sex addiction that ultimately scars them for life. Do not even punish youth for even having these thoughts in their mind. This is something that will impact youth for the rest of their lives. So try to be attentive and understanding in discussing intimacy with youth.

Discussing LGBT+ Relationships and Intimacy With Youth.

As a special topic regarding relationships and intimacy, as loaded a topic of relationships and intimacy are relationships and intimacy involving LGBT types. Imagine you are the parents of a boy who wants to be intimate with or have a relationship with a gay male partner or even with a transgender. Maybe you have a daughter interested in a lesbian relationship or wanting to be intimate with a lesbian female partner. You may even have a transgender child or gender non-binary individual who wants to be intimate and have a relationship with whomever. This discussion matter is a bit more volatile because not as many parents are as accepting of LGBT+ relationships or acts. Some parents may even threaten to kick children out of the house for being any denomination of LGBT+.

If you can as a parent, try to be understanding and mindful of your child or children who feel so attracted and loved to any LGBT+ partner. It is important advice to suggest that your child should be able to love whomever they feel most happy and complete with, even if it is a same-sex partner or some sort of heterosexual, bisexual, pansexual, etc. partner. It is then important to try to discuss intimacy and relationships properly keeping LGBT+ matters in mind. As with any discussion of intimacy and/or relationships, be mindful of trying to discuss these matters in a way youth can understand and apply. It is tougher when it involves LGBT+ matters, but it is not impossible.


Now that I started a few pieces of advice towards relationships, I will provide some final thoughts.

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Making the Conversation: Youth Relationships and Intimacy - Final Thoughts

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While a loaded subject with many different layers to process and unpack, relationships and intimacy are not taboo for youth. Just because this is a loaded topic doesn't mean it is impossible to discuss. It is important to try to discuss relationships and intimacy on an understandable level when youth have their concerns and thoughts in regards to both relationships and intimacy. It is a tougher discussion of relationships and intimacy when the discussion involves LGBT+ relationships and intimacy. At this point, a parent has to take into account LGBT+ acceptance in addition to discussing relationships and intimacy with youth when the matters involve LGBT material.

The discussion involving relationships and intimacy between parents and children is a tough but necessary topic to discuss. Rather than put the issues aside when youth has their concerns over these issues, discuss relationships and intimacy with youth to help prepare them for life. Make sure to discuss these matters in a way that youth can understand. Do not try to overwhelm them with thoughts that may scare youth. Pace the conversation easily and properly to make the discussion process easy. When there is a general understanding overall, both children and parents will win and benefit.

Enough conversation- MAKE THE DISCUSSION when the time arises.





I hope you were able to grasp the general concept here. Do your best to discuss relationships and intimacy with youth in an understandable, relatable level. I wish you well in your efforts. If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my JohnMarineDesigns Weebly site, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin! Let's connect:
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I Hate Your Lover!

WARNING: The following topic may not be suitable for all audiences. Due to the subject matter of this topic, viewer discretion is advised. Parents of younger children will need to restrict or limit younger viewers from viewing this material. Otherwise, you are reading this material at your own risk.

Everyone is free to be in a relationship with almost any total stranger they love. However, there will be people who hate your choice of partner for whatever reason. They may be hated because of a lover's character. They could be hated because that lover may potentially be using someone. They could be hated because they go against what some people hate (for example, politics, religion, sexual orientation, etc.). Regardless, while you and your lover may be totally happy, there may always be someone who disapproves of your relationship. So how do you deal with these times? That is the point of this blog post on "John's Life Space."

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I Hate Your Lover!

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NOTE: I was going to use an image to identify this post, but because there were too many immature ones linked to this topic, I choose to go without an image for this post. Now let's begin.

If you watch a lot of daytime talk shows, the notion of hating someone's lover is a common topic. For example, there may be one person's mother who disapproves of a relationship her son or daughter has with someone else. However strong the hatred is between someone else is can be a deterrent to further developing and nurturing a relationship with a loved one.

Who Hates Others' Lovers?

Almost anybody. Usually, it may be a member of your family who disapproves of you falling in love with a certain individual. Some of the reasons why such hate exists can be any number of reasons. Here are a few examples of why some people would hate certain people an individual is is in love with in the next section:

Why Hate Others' Lovers?

• Hate the personality of one's lover. In this case, someone may have a personality that someone else may disapprove of. For example, you know how some say that "good girls love bad boys." Well, imagine if that "bad boy" is a serial cheater or a player, yet the female who loves him doesn't care about that. This is not going to be an issue unless someone discovers this male cheating on his girlfriend.

• Hate the lover outside of ethnicity, nationality, or culture. This mostly pertains to people thinking a certain person loves someone outside of one's culture and beliefs. An example of this would be a Black person who loves someone of a Latin ethnicity. It is as if to say someone should only date with and love people within his/her own ethnicity or culture. The person who disapproves of an interracial relationship would feel like he/she is damaging a certain ethnicity by dating outside of one's ethnicity.

Another example is if one person of Christian religion dates someone of Islamic religion. A clash of religious beliefs can be a big deterrent in keeping some loving bonds going. Especially if someone is opposed to a different religion, it can be fuel for someone to hate someone who thinks differently among religious beliefs.

• Hate the lover's sexual orientation. Times today are more accepting of LGBT+ individuals than in past times. Even still, there are people who can't stand anyone who is gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, or the like. Some people are still stuck in the past in dealing with LGBT types with past beliefs. As we've seen, a lot more people are accepting of LGBT individuals. So let's say a male is madly in love with his boyfriend, a female loves her girlfriend, or perhaps a male becomes romantically involved with a transgender lover. Some people who simply dislike or outright hate anyone LGBT will likely cringe at the sight of someone kissing or being intimate with anyone LGBT.

In the case of someone who is romantically attached to an LGBT partner and living with family members, there is a possibility that this person may get kicked out of the house or disowned because of his/her/their relationship with an LGBT individual. The parent or family member may possibly say something along the lines of "I didn't raise you to be gay." Some may even go off into a tangent saying that one will "go to Hell" for loving a LGBT partner.

Hate for Lovers: Crisis Situations.

However, if there are reasons to legitimately dislike lovers, it is in crisis situations, such as the ones mentioned in this section:

• Hate for a lover because of being against one's will, and hate because of a controlling lover. A real reason someone can hate one's lover is if someone could be in love with someone because of being held against his/her/their own will. As if to say the individual has no control over being in a controlling relationship. These are situations such as rape and sex trafficking. Half the time, certain individuals locked into such relationships are part of relationships one does not want to be a part of. This is definitely a time to bring attention to law enforcement. In these cases, he/she/they did not choose to be in such a relationship.

• Hate for a lover for controlling/abusive behavior. Also, another reason to dislike one's lover is if that lover is controlling and abusive. If you are the parent or trusted friend of someone in an abusive relationship, you certainly have reason to dislike a lover he/she/they is/are with. These are times of crisis. If the situation looms worse, you may need to get law enforcement involved or various hotlines to call.

• Hate for someone in a May-December relationship. If there is a significant age difference between romantic partners (usually 11 or more years age difference), this is another reason lovers can be hated. Some May-December relationships may not be shady at all, so this is mostly on a case-by-case basis.

These may be the best reasons and most acceptable reasons why someone can disapprove of a certain lover.


No matter what the case, the hate people may have for certain lovers is substantiated. People have their reasons for expressing their hate for certain peoples' lovers. Next section offers some thoughts in regards to hating other lovers.

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I Hate Your Lover! - Final Thoughts

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No matter what reason(s) someone may have for hating certain romantic partners, people will have any reason why someone should not fall in love with certain people. Even if you disapprove of certain lovers, the most important thing to remember is unless a person chose to be with a certain individual, being in love with someone who makes one happy is that person's business; not yours. The only time concern should be raised about who one loves romantically is in cases of domestic abuse or potential crisis. People have always been told and taught to love whomever makes him/her/them happy. We have interracial and intercultural relationships because people simply want whomever they feel most in love with and complete with.

When it comes to LGBT relationships, it is the same story. Even if a person has never engaged in a same-sex relationship, even LGBT relationships suffer when some outside influence hates someone dating an LGBT partner. It is the same situation in dealing with the relationship choices a certain individual has made. Only that person can dictate.

If there is one situation almost anyone can agree on to dislike someone, it is because of a controlling lover. Some controlling lovers can be despicable to the extent of romantic involvement with individuals against their will. These reasons can include rape and sex trafficking. For these situations, one may potentially need to get law enforcement involved to save others from danger from a controlling and abusive lover.

No matter what romantic decision(s) one makes or who one choose to love, one thing to remember is... unless there is any potential danger in a relationship, allow people to get into whatever relationship they choose to be in. Respect one's romantic decisions and give a couple their space even if you don't believe in the beliefs of one's lover. If you can, try to coexist with others to limit any would-be hatred. Love works when all involved parties come together regardless of differences. Without some sort of coherence, love can not exist.





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Understanding Others

Could the real reason why you don't get along with someone fully is because you don't understand someone? Maybe you do understand someone fully, but you get flustered with someone's behavior at times. How well you understand those you are around can help you to keep and maintain relationships with others. Relationships are not just restricted to romantic ones. I am also talking about relations between parents and siblings, employers and their employees, and the like. This blog post is a discussion about trying to understand others in the hopes of building better relationships.

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Understanding Others

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It can be important to fully understand other people when you feel you don't have a hold on how people act. This topic was something I thought of when I played the critically-acclaimed game, "Stardew Valley." This game allowed you to interact with locals and try to establish relationships with others. The more connected you feel towards others, you begin to understand their personalities more. In much the same way in real life, how you are able to get along with others depends on you gaining a general understanding of other people.

To extend the "Stardew Valley" discussion, there were some characters in the game who do not seem as caring until you get to really earn their trust. People whom you may have perceived to be jerks are actually much better people within. You begin to gain a different perspective of how others are when you learn about them and then adjust your own feelings to match their personalities. If someone seems rough around the edges, you may even begin to appreciate people more once you know about them.

How Important Can Gaining an Understanding of Others Be?

It can make a huge difference. Let us pretend a teenager is unwilling to connect with his/her parents because the teenager feels unloved. The teenager may begin to develop self-esteem issues and not be as friendly towards others as a result. The teenager may even struggle in school or always get into trouble because of various influences which make the teenager seem hateful. As the parents of this troubled teen try to reach out to him/her, they would wonder why this teen seems so rebellious. There may be a chance the teen could be shy about disclosing what seemed like a broken bond between sibling and parents. If the parents can understand certain things or reasons why their teen sibling has such a bad attitude, maybe the family can work together to try to repair a broken relationship.

Now let's use a married couple. Let's say one partner seems to only care about oneself more than others, or may have a foul attitude towards doing certain things. If this one spouse has had a history of bad things happen to that person, it impairs the ability to be happier or feel confident. A poor understanding by spouses can be even more damaging if there are siblings involved. Children of a married couple could feel depressed, nervous, perhaps even angry in seeing parents get along. Children could also develop poor habits and have lowered self-esteem as a result. The situation could be worse if conditions lead up to domestic violence or wanting a divorce. If things go towards divorce, a financial crisis could develop among the household. The only hope in this is that a general understanding could be met to help limit damage to a relationship.

So as you can tell, trying to understand people and their actions can help towards trying to repair or rebuild relationships. The best thing anyone can do is to try to understand how people are and try to do things to ensure no real damage is done to a relationship. If you fear someone you care about is acting in such a way that they seem unable to get along with, try to have a one-on-one conversation to help someone feel better. Otherwise, it can be tough to try to get a better understanding and try to love and care for others.

What if YOU Are the Misunderstood One?

If you feel you are the misunderstood one, try to plead your case and let the one(s) you care about fully understand how you feel. Try to gain an understanding that does not lead to more disagreement or a lack of trust. Disclose as much as possible about why you feel not as loved or not as cared for. Once that is done, it is time to think about what it will take to repair a broken bond or rebuild former happiness. This is an opportunity to show how much you care about someone who doesn't seem as caring or understanding about you. TAKE ADVANTAGE!


Some final thoughts are coming up, so go to the next section.

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Understanding Others: Final Thoughts

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Part of caring about other people lies in understanding them. Without a lack of understanding, we are never fully able to care for others or understand why they act in ways which make them seem horrible. In a time where we can really use each other to help build happiness and spread kindness, it is important we try to understand people who we seem to think have problems in being social and respectful. People are not bad just because they seem so uncaring. People can be rough to get along with, but there are reasons why people feel that way. Rather than condemn someone for not being real and respectful, it is more helpful and beneficial to understand why people act in such ways and then try to get along with them. Even the most savage beasts have caring souls. We must try to work with people to ensure we can build better relationships with others and better understand others. Only then can be work towards a brighter and happier tomorrow.





I hope you all enjoyed this blog and this blog post. I also hope you have learned something or took some advice to help make your life better. That is the point of "John's Life Space." If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

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Coping With Sports Losses

Your favorite sports team or athlete lost. Maybe they lost the championship. How do you take these losses? A lot of us in sports believe in "wearing our heart on our sleeves." We are so invested in wanting our favorite teams and athletes to win. Then when they don't win, you feel like trash. So for this blog post, I will discuss dealing with sports losses.

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Coping With Sports Losses

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No one obviously wants to see his/her favorite team or athlete lose. Just like there is success in life, there is also failure. Failure WILL happen. Do not believe your favorite team(s) or athlete(s) are impervious to failure, because that moment will come when losing will cloud a team or athlete's mind once it happens.

As a Houston sports fan, I am used to seeing pro sports teams constantly fail in major settings. I've seen my Houston Texans get ousted from the Playoffs and not even reach the Super Bowl. I've seen my Houston Rockets miss out on the NBA Finals when they won it all in 1994 and 1995. I seen my Astros have three straight seasons with 100+ losses before finally (controversially) winning the 2017 World Series. It becomes too redundant seeing my beloved teams and athletes fail as much as I've tried to cheer them on. Most sports fans are what are considered "fair weather fans," meaning they only are happy with sports teams when they are winning. Even fans used to futility even stand behind their teams in spite of failure.

Some teams and athletes may experience long periods of futility or never get to be on the highest stage in the most challenging events. The New Orleans Saints, who have been around since 1967 for example, have never played in the Super Bowl until the 2009 Season, when won Super Bowl XLIV in 2010. There was a time where Prairie View A&M lost 80 straight games in football before finally winning again. The Beavers of CalTech hasn't won a conference game until 2011, having a streak of 207 straight losses before finally winning a game in 2007. There was a time where the Chicago Cubs haven't won a World Series in over a century until they won it all in 2016. The Boston Red Sox haven't won the World Series in over 80 years until they finally won it all in 2004 (last title then was in 1918). The Sydney Swans of Australian Rules Football won the championship in 2005 after their last championship was back in 1933. The most important thing to remember is that each team will eventually have one of their strongest seasons and reach the top of the mountain. If you stay with something, you can always improve, and you will have a day that feels like your greatest achievement after so much futility. Long story short: "patience is a virtue."


I will now go into discussing how to cope with sports losses.

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Coping With Sports Losses: Things to Remember

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Here are some things to remember when your favorite teams or athletes lose, and I will begin with one thing very important to remember...

It's Just a Game!

Some people take sports TOO seriously. Sports are a means of having entertainment and performing hard. Some others think about sports as being as important as any governmental, ethnic, or religious connotations.

Life Goes On.

How do you think I feel when I see my beloved teams and athletes lose? It isn't the end of the world or life as we know it just because a sports team loses. You should consider seeking some professional help if sports futility takes over your mindset.

Think About How to Improve.

If it is a regular season game or non-critical sporting event one loses, look for ways to improve when suffering a loss. If it is a major event or some postseason event one loses, first celebrate reaching the highest level of competition, then think about how to improve for the next time. Maybe new players, better players, coaching staff, or some newer strategies should be implemented to improve the team for the future.

Accept Your Punishment (If Betting).

If you lose a friendly bet and have to face some kind of punishment, accept it and move on. Granted the punishment is wholesome and not overly damaging, of course.

(For Parents and Family Members) Keep Your Player Positive.

This is if you are the parent(s) or a good friend of an athlete. Keep a player positive after suffering a loss. There may be some players who may be crying or bitterly upset after a loss. When faced with something like this and if available to help someone, do what you can to help that frustrated athlete cope. If you are a parent, don't try to punish your child because they were supposed to win but didn't. Winning a sports game is not as important as passing your classes in school or college/university. So be considerate and mindful in these regards.


If you consistently get your mind racked by losing sports teams and athletes, there is one "extreme" move to take:

Stop Following or Stay Away From Sports.

I know there are some people who simply just give up on being a sports fan. That's okay. Some people are not fans of certain hobbies. Some people do not like reading or music much. Sports is the same deal. You don't NEED to be a sports fan if you do not want to. Perhaps follow sports again when something gets you excited again for sports.


I will go with some Final Thoughts in the next section.

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Coping With Sports Losses: Final Thoughts

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Sports bring us together and gets us excited. When our beloved teams and athletes win, you feel great inside. When our beloved teams and athletes lose, however, it becomes damaging to take and accept. Sports shouldn't be taken too seriously. If you suffer from depression based on sports, you will need to get some kind of counseling or consolation from loved ones. If you are an athlete, you are often taught to play the next game and have a short memory. Try not to let the desire to win take over your life and your way of thinking.

In addition, don't criticize other people for being fans of certain teams that keep on losing or do not usually win games and championships. A fan decides whom he or she loves most and will root heavily for those teams and athletes. Sports fans do not need to be fans of only successful teams or teams and athletes currently doing well to be worthy of respect.

If you are an athlete yourself reading this, remember you will win and lose. Be happy when you win. Think about how you need to improve when you do not do well. Sometimes even after victories, find out what you can do better to keep winning. Just keep trying to improve. Stay in good shape as well.

Winning is natural, and so is losing. It takes a lot to accept failure and learn from it. You can still make yourself stronger and better whether you are an athlete or a sports fan.

GOOOO... (your favorite team(s)/athlete(s)!)





That's all for this blog post. Hopefully you have found some sound advice from me and even gotten some insight. Please have yourself a great day/night. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my JohnMarineDesigns Weebly site, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin! Let's connect:
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Are You Comfortable With Your Gender?

Conventional thinking suggests there are males and females. As we know, though, there are more than these two genders. Some are transgender, intersex, agender, and countless other terms. Better acceptance of LGBT in today's society means more people are changing up their gender, sexual orientation, romantic preferences, and more. This blog post pertains to gender. I also ask if you should question your own gender. So welcome to "John's Life Space!"

Before I Begin (1)...

This topic is a sensitive topic and may not be suitable for all audiences.

Before I Begin (2)...

I am NOT an expert at LGBT-related issues, but I do try to provide quality topics for discussion. Do not offend me too much as I try to professionally discuss this matter. This gender issue can be a confusing one for a lot of people, and I will try to do my best to discuss this topic in a proper and complete manner. PLEASE correct me on things if I provide misinformation.

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Are You Comfortable With Your Gender?

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^ from: aauw.org - Do you idenify as male? Female? Any gender at all? Gender identity can be as vital a person's personality as one's name or any other traits.

This blog post was inspired by recording artist Demi Lovato announcing she became gender non-binary and changed pronouns from "she/her" to "they/them." As much as we all prefer to be properly called by our name and not given certain terms of endearment, being gendered properly is as important of an issue as any other. A person who may be named Michael, for example, may not want to be referred to as "Mike." Someone who is not gendered properly would be offended if considered something else. The pronouns we use and our identities must remain intact and be respected.

Seismic shifts in society thanks to LGBT types have made more people embrace simply being human rather than stay tied to conventional wisdom. For example, there were Toys R Us stores that did away with sections for boys toys and girls toys. Various celebrites have announced themselves to neither be considered exclusively male or female. Even a video game called "Calico" allows you to use whatever pronouns you prefer, even if you prefer being gender non-binary. Gender identity in a lot of senses starts to feel like it is going the way of the Stone Age.

Why Question Gender?

There are a lot of reasons why people consider their gender. For one, identifying as one gender means you are happy with your gender and all of the social norms and responsibilities that define that gender. So society has its gender norms and gender roles which define males and females. Anyone whose personalities are outside of the realm of any usual male or female is considered is usually grounds for ridicule. As we know, not everyone fits into the general category or persona of traditional males or traditional females. Therefore, some people consider themselves to not fit into qualities of males and/or females. As examples, there are males who wear skinny jeans- even if they have to wear skinny jeans made for females. There are boys who play with dolls. A female at birth who may wear feminine dresses and makeup may play a lot of intense sports and be ultra tomboyish. So some people are not entirely cisgender (identifying as and acting as one's birth gender). Those who do not identify as their birth gender often prefer different pronouns. Some even... go gender non-binary (or genderqueer or "enby").

The way I see it, people change their pronouns and genders because people simply feel they are not exclusively male nor female. Is this a bad thing? Who said it was a good thing? Most people simply have personalities and feelings opposite of what others' gender identity is. It would be proper to say people are just being themselves and defining themselves however they want and not be tied down to what is expected of them by social norms. So if you are a male who dresses up in high heels, flirty dresses, wear makeup, and still consider identify as a male; that is your call. If you are a female who eats potato chips, drinks beer, wear baggy jeans, and hate wearing dresses and/or makeup, that is your call as well. If you don't feel you are entirely exclusively connected to your birth gender and what it entails, then feel free to change up your gender identity. You can be a male with some female qualities; conversely, you can be a female with some male qualities.

Because there are those who do not properly fit in with "male" or "female" based on their birth gender, people change up their gender identity. They also want others to identify them properly using proper pronouns. So a male born a male who identifies as a "she/her" prefers to be addressed and recognized as such. Someone born male or female may choose to identify as "they/them." Usually, "they/them" as a pronoun for a single entity sounds strange, as we normally associate "they/them" with multiple entities. When it comes to pronouns for people, the pronoun most people would hate to be referred to as is an "it." "It" is more reserved for non-organic creatures, and to refer to someone as an "it" would mean the person in question is not a human at all, and that is incredibly disrespectful to that person. Even one Twitch streamer said, "if you refer to me as an 'it,' we're done."

Who Questions Their Gender?

Almost anyone of any age can question their gender identity or choose to exhibit features of either males or females. Even children may feel they are born in the wrong body or do not wish to exclusively be considered "boys" or "girls." So this issue affects ALL of us.

Becoming Transgender.

If you are not happy with your birth gender and perhaps feel you were born in the wrong body, a number of individuals go the route of being transgender. This usually involves going through a lot of surgery and the use of supplements to help properly become a member of the gender opposite of your birth gender. Being transgender can range from crossdressing to wanting sexual reassignment surgery (SRS) and hormone replacement therapy (HRT) among other medical practices.

Intersex Types.

Let's get one thing clear- transgender and intersex are two different things and are not related. Intersex means you were born with any number of features that do not exclusively consider you either male or female. Intersex makes you neither male nor female. You can sort of be like one or another if you are intersex.

Being Agender.

If you are agender, you do not identify as male, female, not intersex, and not even transgender. You prefer being genderless if you are agender.


So now that we've laid the groundwork for this topic, it's time I ask the topic's question. Advance to the next section.

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Are You Comfortable With Your Gender?

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As mentioned earlier, there a couple of instances to determine whether or not you prefer one gender or set of pronouns over others. What choices you make based on your feelings determine what sort of gender identity you prefer wanting to be referred to as. Let's look at some situations...

YES, You Are Comfortable With Your Gender.

If you were born male and identify and act as a male, then go with "he/him." If you were born female and identify and act as a female, then go with "she/her."

In this sense, you are considered cisgender- meaning you identify as and act as the gender you were born with. You are mostly content with your gender and do not feel you should be addressed by any different pronouns. It shows you are comfortable with and okay with being referred to by the gender you prefer to align yourself. That's even if you are a male who wears feminine clothing, or if you are a very boyish looking female. You may be a male who tends to smile a lot and even consider both looking good and keeping your space clean as most females may think. You may be a female who is tomboyish in looks and attitude. You can also be a proud parent based on whichever gender you align yourself with and prefer to be identified as. You could be a proud father who is female in appearance and act and identify as a female. Conversely, you could be a loving mother who is male in appearance and act and identify as a male. There are no worries for you here.

NO, You Are Not Comfortable With Your Gender.

If you were born male but act and identify as female, you can go "she/her." If you were born female but act and identify as a male, then go "he/him." If you feel born in the wrong body or want to change your gender orientation, you may go the route of being transgender. It may also be possible you can make yourself gender non-binary or agender.

Some people who prefer being referred to or identifying as one's opposite gender mostly are unhappy being one person. This may include a male who plays with dolls and wear skirts/dresses, heels, makeup, feminine lingerie, or feminine swimwear. One who feels more in line with being one's opposite gender are often not happy with their own gender. They experience gender dysphoria and seek change.

You Are Undecided With Your Gender.

There is a possibility you simply do not fit in with either male or female, nor do you want to be identified as one or the other. Maybe you are not interested in going through any serious medical work or anything to be closer in line with any gender. You may choose to be gender non-binary or even agender. All of these thoughts are perfectly fine.


So now that we have discussed gender in a variety of categories, let me offer some final thoughts.

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Are You Comfortable With Your Gender? Final Thoughts

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As much as we tend to question ourselves on a number of things, one important element of who we are is gender. Gender, while not a total barometer of who we are, is still a big part of defining us as people. Being referred outside of our gender can be as damaging as being called out of our names. So we therefore tend to choose a gender designation consistent with our personalities and traits. Positive trends for LGBT types mean it is okay to define who we are. It is more acceptable now to be born a male/female and identify and act as a female/male. Some may even be considered one gender but identify as another gender. Some may not even fit into any gender and consider themselves agender. You may have males who have very feminine characteristics, and you may have females who have very masculine characteristics. The one thing most individuals ask of others is to refer to their gender properly.

No matter what gender you identify as, gender is as much a part of who you are as your ethnicity, nationality, religion, and other factors. Most people would not want to be called out of their name, so why call people out of their gender (if they have a gender preference)? Part of respecting a person is to respect one's gender preference(s). If a person is born a male and lives or prefers being called "she/her," do not refer to this person by "he/him" or any terms referring to males. Even "them/their" for a single entity sounds strange to most. However, avoid calling a person an "it."

Part of what makes you you is gender. If you have a preference on the front of gender, let it be known to the world and make sure other people refer to you properly by your chosen gender. It is perfectly fine to choose your proper gender designation and proper pronoun usage. It doesn't make you any less of a person to go by a gender outside of what you were born as. If you were born male but act and identify as a female, you should be able to be referred to by female pronouns. If you were born female but act and identify as a male, you should be able to be referred to by male pronouns. Or perhaps you born intersex or identify as agender. Gender is a big part of who you are, and it should not be a deterrent to who you really are inside and out. It makes you no less of a person to identify as a gender other than your birth gender.





I hope you found my blog post regarding gender intriguing. I do what I can to try to discuss life issues on "John's Life Space." Be sure to Subscribe and Follow if you enjoy my work and want to see more of my blogging work as it becomes available. Here is a discussion question for you in case you enjoyed my topic here:

Are you comfortable with your gender? Or do you even identify as a specific gender?

Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my JohnMarineDesigns Weebly site, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin! Let's connect:
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