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"John's Life Space" features a variety of content to many audiences. The majority of content is meant to suit an audience 13 years of age and older. Some material offered in this blog may not be suitable for all audiences and may include some topics too sensitive or discomforting to discuss. All advice offered in this blog is not meant to replace or substitute practical help. If you require counseling or want more professional help, please consult your healthcare provider, a psychologist, or any other qualified individual.

Tuesday, March 7, 2023

Transgender Acceptance and Inclusion

John B. Marine | March 07, 2023 | | | | | | Be the first to comment!
Recent controversy by a major candy maker has inspired me to discuss transgender acceptance and inclusion. As the LGBT community is being better accepted, transgender acceptance and inclusion is still a major hurdle. This blog discussion of transgender acceptance and inclusion may not solve any transgender issues, but it will be a chance to discuss transgenders being better accepted and included in a number of arenas and outlets.






Transgender Acceptance and Inclusion


Let me start this post by sharing the inspiration for this topic.

Hershey's Chocolate [of Canada] generated controversy recently when promoting their "HerSHE" candy. The controversy involves a transgender woman being among real females. In today's changing culture, a lot of people think this is an excellent move for a transgender woman to be regarded and respected as a woman. The anti-transgender crowd, however, thought much differently. Some even used the saying, "women are born not worn." This 2023 Hershey's HerSHE campaign fueled the desire of me to discuss transgender acceptance and inclusion.


In Case You're Interested...

Check out this brief piece that helped spark my discussion on transgender acceptance and inclusion:



^ "Hershey's Women's Day campaign featuring trans activist sparks backlash"


In addition to this bit of controversy, a number of different state governments in the United States are ruling things like drag queen shows as punishable crimes. There is still a great deal of transphobia ranging from violence and discrimination against transgenders. A number of transgenders have lost their lives due to senseless violence.

The LGBT community is still very much trying to get more support and bearings, but it is still an uphill struggle to be accepted and included. Some people think transgenders are more along the lines of those who *choose* to be a gender other than their birth gender. For example, it is like (in the minds of a transphobe) a male chooses for a day to be a female rather than accept that a male at birth identifies as and acts as a female. I even remember when a female-to-male transgender became pregnant. Regardless of the gender preference of an individual, it is best to respect and acknowledge those preferences along with preferred pronouns. If a male prefers any pronouns, respect that. If a female prefers "he/him/they," respect those pronouns and use them.


Until transgenders are better accepted by the general public, we have to strive towards helping them get the respect and attention they aspire. How do we work towards transgenders being better accepted and included? I'll begin by discussing acceptance. Next section, please.




Transgender Acceptance


A lot of people mostly think of transgender types either as crossdressing or something comical. As if most people believe some transgender types really enjoy *playing* as their opposite gender. LGBT+ as it stands is already an exercise in trying to be accepted. Being transgender is even more a difficult deal to try to be accepted. Transgenders simply want to be accepted and acknowledged for their gender preference(s). Perhaps the bigger issue would involve those who legally and medically have proper transgender transition going. Even those who still have their preferences towards gender should be respected for their choices.

A person's gender preference is as important and as intimate as a person's name. As much as someone hates being called out of their name, a person hates to be misgendered. Even if an M2F transgender specifically prefers being referred to as a she/her, she hates being referred to as a he/him. What could be a less stressing circumstance is if the transgender person prefers any or all pronouns.

I do think as the LGBT community is becoming better accepted, there eventually will be fewer transphobic types. You can't eliminate transphobia, but it can surely be curbed. The problem is that not many people are willing to accept certain transgenders.


Transgender Acceptance: Transgender Youth.

My biggest fear among transgenders is with transgender youth. One of the brightest beacons and hopes for the transgender community is Jazz Jennings. Having such a supportive family and actually going through with all the different nuances of transitioning properly has been handled nicely by Jazz and her family. Even if you never seen "I Am Jazz," just know Jazz was a little boy who always known she was a girl in a boy's body. The extensive experiences by Jazz has helped her to become the beautiful and strong woman she is today.

Most transgender youth, however, do not have such support that Jazz Jennings got. Some siblings actually get kicked out of their houses by their parents or relatives for being any denomination of LGBT, let alone transgender. I remembered the first transgender I've ever known how she hated to be kicked out of her house by her grandmother just because she's transgender. This was in my college days, but being transgender in grade school can be damaging. Imagine being 17 or younger and out of a house because of being transgender.

Young transgenders could be faced with such a tough life ahead, so it is best to work with them as well as offer hope and protection to them. It is best to give them hope rather than let them feel worthless. If you are a parents of a transgender (or even a genderqueer) individual at 17 or younger, try to work with them to ensure they will be okay for years to come. Among peers, respect a transgender and whatever pronouns and gender identity a young transgender may prefer.


This is all a tough subject. Now coming up, I discuss transgender inclusion.




Transgender Inclusion


As someone who follows fashion, the feeling of inclusion is what a lot of people want to have. Fashion designers have been more open to designing clothes for many more figures and even for the LGBT community. Hershey's offering inclusion for transwomen as part of the "HerSHE" campaign is commendable. It is commendable even if the anti-transgender crowd think Hershey's should be ashamed for including a transwoman to be among cisgender women. Playboy Magazine, known for their sultry models, even showcased a transgender model in the magazine's long history. There is certainly inclusion among certain entities to include transgenders.

Transgenders do not believe they are their birth gender. Some people experience gender dysphoria, the feeling of being dissatisfied with their birth gender or preferred gender. Some people wanting to transition have hated their lives living as their birth gender and want to start anew as another gender. A transgender can be very young or even be north of age 50. Regardless- all transgenders want to be included and respected.

I think a lot of people tend to look at transgenders as monsters. Fact is- transgenders are human beings as any other human. Unless guilty of committing legitimate crimes, they should be included among the rest of the world. The trouble to all of this is that transgenders have a tough time being included. Some just fail to see the person and only latch onto gender. Until more people are accepted for their personality and their abilities, this will continue to be an issue.


Allow me to close out this one with some final thoughts.




Transgender Acceptance and Inclusion: Final Thoughts


Transgender acceptance and inclusion can be tough to come by. Though in today's culture, it is becoming better accepted in a number of countries. A changing culture means that current culture has to keep up with new changes. Those changes include better accepting the LGBT community, including transgenders.

Acceptance for the transgender community begins with giving hope, protection, and respect to transgenders. Transgenders should be able to be accepted into the workforce and stay in families. Acceptance among transgenders also mean respecting the gender(s) and pronoun(s) they prefer. The acceptance process can be tougher for transgender youth, as the stakes can be higher for them. Parents who refuse to be as supportive to young transgenders can run the risk of severing the bonds of parent-sibling for the rest of a young transgender's life. So special care is needed to prevent the chances of some serious distrust.

Transgender inclusion is as big an issue as acceptance. It helps knowing a transgender can be accepted in a given space and not be subject to any kind of discrimination. If my earlier examples of inclusion were of any indication, I am sure more companies and environments will be more inclusive and respectful of transgenders.

I do feel LGBT types will be better accepted, at least here in the United States of America. If we can get over the mindset that transgenders are monsters or diseased, we can better accept them as people and with the proper pronouns they prefer. It took ages for racial injustice to be curbed. We can do the same for the LGBT community, including transgenders. Unless a transgender is guilty of legitimate crimes or commits crimes, all transgenders should be respected equally as non-transgender individuals.


For More Information...

I have a list of helpful resources for everyone, but I have a special set of helpful resources for the LGBT community. You may view my LGBT resources at LGBT Resources on John's Life Space.





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Thursday, March 2, 2023

Asking for a Friend

John B. Marine | March 02, 2023 | | | | Be the first to comment!
What has become the latest trendy phrase is "asking for a friend." The concept works like this- rather than the person in question ask for advice, his/her/their friend asks for them. Can another person be trusting enough to legitimately ask a question to someone else and get proper advice?

I actually think this is a legitimate concept if one actually is too afraid to ask on one's own. However, I do not think one person should feel overly embarrassed. If someone wanted to visit my blog(s) for advice on something, it's here for you- no need to ask, not really any shame if you have such concerns.


Asking for a Friend: Sample Scenario.

Okay- let us set up a scenario. Let's say a straight male has a romantic attraction to another male or a transgender woman, and he has questions regarding intimacy. That male would probably want to find out on his own answers to his questions, but he would feel embarrassed to ask on his own. So someone would tell a friend to get some answers speaking on his behalf. I think someone would have to be bold enough and trusting enough to help get answers to such questions.


Asking for a Friend: No "Friend?"

What if the "asking for a friend" was simply one person having an embarrasing question and not really asking on behalf of any person? This situation would be the kind of situation where someone can absolutely question the validity of asking others for advice. In a situation like this, the person would mostly pretend to ask for advice but is really lying about trying to ask a question on a friend's behalf when there is no one he/she/they asks for. Such people protect one's own character by pretending to ask on someone else's behalf when they are the ones wanting certain advice on something.


When Asking for a Friend Can Work.

The only real situation where I can see where asking for a friend works is if someone asks a friend about something to someone who may be tough to communicate with. For example, someone may want some advice from someone who may be tough to talk with. This is the only real situation where I can see asking for a friend actually working.


Final Thoughts on Asking For a Friend.

Salute to anyone who is willing to ask questions about things to other people on their behalf. I know it can be tough trying to ask on your own, but there is more credibility and honesty when you ask questions yourself or looking for answers on your own. It is okay to ask about embarrassing things to others. Especially if you have trust issues, it is best to ask about things on your own than rely on someone else to ask on your behalf. Maybe if someone is tough to talk with about things, then it may be okay to ask for someone to try to talk with such individuals. Other than that, try to gather the courage to ask about things yourself. Preserve your honesty and character by asking questions yourself that may embarrass or concern you rather than rely on friends.





At least... these are my thoughts regarding the whole "asking for a friend" thing. You are free to react any way you see fit. Or let me ask...

How do you feel about "asking for a friend" about certain things?

You have been reading "John's Life Space"- my blog about life issues! If you enjoyed your time here and want more discussion of various life issues, make sure to subscribe/follow my work here! Recommend this blog to others if you find my topics and advice helpful. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

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