"John's Life Space" features a variety of content to many audiences. The majority of content is meant to suit an audience 13 years of age and older. Some material offered in this blog may not be suitable for all audiences and may include some topics too sensitive or discomforting to discuss. All advice offered in this blog is not meant to replace or substitute practical help. If you require counseling or want more professional help, please consult your healthcare provider, a psychologist, or any other qualified individual.
Welcome to John's Life Space- Life happens. | Established November 8, 2017
Anhedonia is defined as the lack of experiencing pleasure, and it is often a symptom of major depressive disorder. Imagine partaking in your favorite activities- only to not enjoy them. That is what happens when anhedonia takes over your mind. You don't get to enjoy certain pleasures that give you pleasure.
A lot of us partake in activities and such to relax our minds. When you have anhedonia, however, doing what you love does not give you an sort of satisfaction or happiness. Depression limits your ability to enjoy life or even enjoy your favorite activities. Anhedonia makes you even more incapable of feeling pleasure. Depression and anhedonia, however, are not entirely the same thing. One needs not be depressed to experience anhedonia.
In addition to anhedonia, there are also conditions known as social anhedonia and physical anhedonia. Social anhedonia is an inability to feel pleasure through being with others. Physical anhedonia involves a lack of pleasure from physical or certain emotional experiences. Imagine not being able to experience joy being around friends/family or in actions such as shaking hands, hugging, or even kissing. Anhedonia is a bane to various social interactions.
If you experience anhedonia of any kind, a lot of what makes life fun and enjoyable does not seem to matter. You can not enjoy the pleasures of life as you normally would if you didn't have anhedonia. This is a condition that makes each day feel lifeless and meaningless. If you feel you have anhedonia, the best thing you can do is consult with your healthcare provider or seek help from a psychotherapist. It is not easy to root out the main cause of what may cause anhedonia in most individuals. Every case of anhedonia may be different from one another, so make sure to seek some professional help if you are in this situation.
Other Resources.
For more information on anhedonia, I have provided these resources for you:
If you or someone you know is experiencing or may have anhedonia, just know there is help out there for you to retain pleasure in your favorite activities or being around people. Do not give up on this. Get the needed help you have access to.
If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.
Do you feel like some people only communicate with you when something is wrong or when you fail? This angers me personally. Someone who may think so can range from peers to even family members. Maybe you do have certain problems that need to be corrected. Conversely, you may be around people who simply don't love and respect you enough to acknowledge your positive qualities rather than always attack you for doing wrong. No matter what the case, only you know most what you are capable of. It is time for me to speak on this topic.
Always Seen Negatively
All of us have qualities which make us good and bad. How much people view our qualities help establish a sort of overall opinion about ourselves. Are we great and engaging people that make us loved in the face of others? Are we poor enough to actually not be as loved as we could be?
Some people will say something along the lines of, "only God can judge me." This means that for whatever someone bad may say about us, no one person can absolutely judge us properly to give a final opinion about who we are and what we mean to this world. Why do we judge, though? Well, we sometimes want to know how other people think about us regardless of what we think about ourselves. It is a case of wanting to know... but then not really wanting to know.
Okay- that moment comes. "What do you think about me?" If are given positive remarks or mostly positive remarks, you're good! However, let's say you aren't as good as you may think. Now what?
Personally, I feel offended when I am only seen for my negatives instead of my positives. A person who mostly seems to communicate with you with your faults makes you want to cut that person out of your life instead of being re-reminded (to that person) how horrible of a person you are. What is worse is only being negative to someone and not offer any advice or help to someone who is facing problems. In this regard, you are essentially a bully if you only talk to certain people when they are doing wrong or if you only communicate with people when someone is at their lowest points. In some people with anger problems, it makes some disturbed people want to fight somebody or something. Constantly feeling seen negatively (or feeling this way) only lessens your worth to the world in your eyes. You know you are a better person than what most people think about you, so do what you can to help drown out negative thoughts about you people may make about you.
When Usually Viewed Poorly.
I sometimes think of celebrities and some other popular figures in this regard. As an example, there was a time when Miley Ray Cyrus was considered the worst celebrity influence. Many people (myself included) loved her as "Hannah Montana" on Disney. Outside of "Hannah Montana," she became the worst celebrity influence for children in 2009 mostly for her "Wrecking Ball" song and her sexual dancing. Despite this, many praised Miley Cyrus for being a positive influence, like with her song "The Climb."
There are times when media outlets only seem to focus on the negatives of people. This makes it to where it is easy to dismiss people on certain other qualities. For example, let's say a well-known celebrity does lots of charity work and encourages other people to be better... but he/she/they may be seen as a bad person because of some incident that person has made into a bad figure. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion about things- even including people. When you know you are a better person than how you are portrayed, it makes you feel terrible inside knowing you are better than what people may think. A person who is even trying to get into the better graces of people often want to feel loved or recognized.
The reality, though, is that not everyone will be seen in any positive light all the time. Some people even await when someone who seems a hero/heroine will do something wrong to where all of the positive qualities turn out to be lies. No matter who you love or are into, you are never going to be 100% supportive of everyone. Everyone (including myself) is going to have some quality you are not going to like and will give you a reason to hate someone.
Now let me talk about what to do if constantly feeling negatively.
Always Seen Negatively - By Peers.
You are going to encounter people who always seem to think of you negatively. Are you really a bad person? This is common in school. You know you are not going to be the most popular person on campus among other students. You will be picked on and possibly bullied.
Maybe you are part of a workplace where you always feel slighted by the general public. Do you still do your job at your workplace, or do you feel you are replacable, serviceable talent?
In the face of peers, always remember who are and what you really mean to people around you. Your purpose to others is not to be the butt of everyone's jokes unless you are seriously antisocial or lacking any positive qualities. Surround yourself with people who care about you and understand you. You do not have to go it alone or be more reserved.
Always Seen Negatively - By Family.
I always say the closest friends you'll make are your family. When you feel a family member, stepfamily member, or a relative keeps regarding you negatively; you feel hurt because that is someone close to you who looks at you in a negative way. I once researched the murder of singer Marvin Gaye thinking about this topic. Marvin Gaye was one of the most powerful and popular singers in R&B music until he was killed by his father.
Sometimes, we make tough decisions to cut some people out of our lives; or at least, not be reluctant to look to some people for help. That even includes cutting family members out of our lives. Anything to help us do and feel better has to be done for our betterment later in life including isolation from loved ones will have to be made.
If you feel a family member may be difficult to deal with, you may just have to choose to work independently and limit your association and contact with that person. It may not help your bond with someone improve, but it can help for you to feel better about yourself in the area of such people. This is one of those tough decisions you may want to make if you feel a family member always sees you negatively and have given up trying to get into someone's good graces.
Always Seen Negatively - Special Considerations.
Maybe the reason you are seen negatively by people is because of certain qualities that overshadow anything good you do. Namely, reasons because of religious views, governmental views, sexual orientation, and the like. You might be a person who helps others and encourages others. Despite this, you may forever be seen in a poor light because of something like coming out gay or being openly gay.
Cases like this really should encourage you to move on from others and only focus on yourself. This comes back to the quote of not pandering to someone who you do not see in your future.
What to Do To Not See People So Negatively
Here are some things to keep in mind in regards to not being so negative to people...
• Celebrate and respect someone's success. Even if you are someone who disapproves of one's work, at least respect the person is doing very well and is very happy. Only be concerned if someone really is going down a path that is considered dangerous or hazardous.
• Respect others' privacy. If someone chooses to be privately or not want to communicate with certain people, respect the privacy of others. Don't try to barge in.
• Let others have their happiness. Do not try to ruin someone who may be having happy vibes. People who are on a creative trip or a happy trip should not be brought down. Allow people to be happy.
• Remember you do not know what people are going through. Before you judge someone, do not assume you know everything a person is going through if they are doing so poorly. If someone is not willing to express their issues with you, either they choose to keep their problems to themselves, or they don't trust you enough to try to solve their issues. Just have patience with people you love or care about.
• Let a person be on their own if they can't be helped, but do not hassle or bully that person. It is tough to try to work with someone who may not want to be helped or can't be trusted enough. The best thing you may want to do is simply not associate yourself with that person. Just make sure not to continually harass or demean someone.
You are not a bad person just because someone is such a poor person in your eyes. It also does not mean you are a poor influence because you can't help someone who may need help. People just think in different ways to where even the best advice is not really helpful in the long run. You can only do what you can do. Just make yourself better as a person if you feel you can do better to better get through to others.
Now that we have established a lot of ground work, it is time I give some final thoughts. The next section wraps up this post, so move ahead.
Always Seen Negatively - Final Thoughts
While others' perceptions about us are not required to make, we at least want to know if we can be better people no matter what anyone thinks about us. Do not persuade people to give opinions about ourselves. However, always think about how you are perceived to others as opposed to what you think about yourself. Your actions can help determine if people will respect you or disrespect you.
It is not the end of the world because someone you care enough about always seems to be negative about you or only focus on you when doing wrong. It may mean you have to either try to build a better bond with such people or be more independent of that person's support. You could be a perfectly fine person who may be trying but still get looked down for whatever reason(s). Cut some people out of your life or limit your contact with someone who you feel you can't build a solid bond with.
One other important thing to think about in all of this is to not judge someone so poorly when you don't know what the person is going through. Even if you think you know what someone is going through, you really do not know EVERYTHING a person may be dealing with. So make sure to respect the privacy and thoughts of what someone is going through. Do not attempt to help someone by making backhanded compliments or only feeling someone only exists to hurt you.
We can do a lot to try to help be seen better than how a lot of us are ultimately seen. While we want to know how others feel about us, only you can judge you best. Some of us may be trying to better liked, but progress could be slow. It still does not mean we are failures because of our lack of trying or slow rates of success. We can always work to improve and be seen as better people. That is, unless some people have unrealistic expectations about us. No one person is a disgrace to humanity unless that person commits seriously offensive crimes (such as murder or terrorism). Anyone who is seen poorly can work to be better in the eyes of such people. If some people seem too complicated to work with or be associated with, the best thing you could do is simply cut that person or those people out of your life. Their loss will be your gain unless that person or those people can finally come around to respecting you as the person you truly are... IF they eventually do...
I hate discussing things like this, but I feel I need to get these things out based on thoughts of mine or personal experiences. If I am experiencing some things I discuss in my blog posts, I feel and want to believe others may need some help on the same matters. I always say we are all battling the same battles. From time to time, we need to rely on each other and build off of each other to help live better lives. That is what I hope I am accomplishing on "John's Life Space." So if you appreciate my efforts, please feel free to follow my blog(s) in some capacity. Support me and my work any way you can. If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.
If you want to start a family but not go through with having your own children, parents can consider adoption. Adopted children are not one's biological family, but adoptive parents can give children new hope and opportunities not previously had from their biological parents. Adopted children often come from either failed parents, divorced parents who lost custody, or from deceased parents. Regardless, children can have new opportunities and chances by being adopted by adopted parents. This blog post discusses adopting children and the challenges involved for both the children and the parents.
Adoption
What brings a lot of couples joy is in starting and maintaining a family. Some families may want to start their own family but do not get to have children of their own. So what some prospective families do is adopt children.
Adoption is the process of bringing a child or children of another birth family into one's own. Most adopted children come from orphans, divorced parents, or even parents whom lost custody of their children. Children without homes or families end up being without a family and/or a place to call home. While it is possible to live without parents, it surely isn't fun or productive. So rather than have to live the foster child life, there are parents loving enough and caring enough to take a chance at bringing someone into their own family to take care of them. Adopted children may also find themselves a forever family and/or a forever home outside of their biological parents.
As I mentioned, parents willing to take a chance to take in a foster child to adopt will be rewarded with being with loving parents and even taking in some new skills. There have been many famous foster children, but one I will focus on is Simone Biles. Simone Biles came from parents who dealt with drug-related issues. She went from being born in Columbus, OH, USA to being adopted by a family in Spring, TX, USA. Simone Biles would go from getting into gymnastics as a child to becoming a gymnastics superstar for Team USA in the Olympics. Simone Biles' story is encouragement in knowing what can be possible if adoptive parents take in the challenge of adopting.
Being part of a new family means you have to get adjusted to a new set of circumstances. For example, if a child grew up in one's biological family with any number of toxic environment factors, and then goes to a family with better income and better educated family; the adopted child will have to get accustomed to a new environment. So maybe an adopted child will get used to having things like broadband Internet and living in a larger house or a better community. Having things a child didn't have previously can be enjoyed with a new family.
Adoption Challenges.
Some of the challenges involved in adopting children is mostly the legal process, financial matters, and of course- disciplining foster children. Some foster children will take some time for which to get adjusted to being with a family and being taken care of in a family. That alone can be a challenge in its own right. Hurdles, both of the legal and financial variety, can also be taxing (no pun intended) on adoptive parents.
I would argue the challenge for adopted children is in trying to learn right from wrong and also trying to be functional members of society. Since a lot of foster children may not know how to socialize properly, this can prove a problem in developing them later in life. They will need to be properly taught how to conduct themselves in social settings as well as in school.
If you want an idea of adoption challenges for children, here is a video for you:
For the adoptive families, they'll have to learn how to become parents. Parenting is nothing that is taught formally at learning institutions. Families have to learn things on the fly. No parents are ever perfect, even and especially adoptive parents.
LGBT+ Couples Adoption.
Most people believe a child stands the best chance at life by having a mother and a father in his/her life. Having a mother and a father gives two entities a chance to nurture and develop a child. Much like how the lines of marriage have been blurred to where it used to be marriage defined as a loving bond between a man and a woman, parenting lines are being blurred as having a mother figure and a father figure. Can two gay men respectively be dad and mom? Can two lesbian women respectively be mom and dad? Male-to-female transgender women aren't able to get pregnant, so can a transgender woman be mom?
I was first introduced to this topic a many years ago on "The Ricki Lake Show." Ricki Lake (in the FOX days of this daytime talk show, not the NBC one) had one episode discussing if LGBT couples should adopt children. LGBT rights and responsibilities have changed through the early course of the 21st Century. Such LGBT people have become better accepted and less criticized and less comical. That even comes to the point of curbing discrimination among LGBT couples. Even as LGBT couples vie for various rights, part of that vying even comes in the form of wanting to be parents.
For the homophobic types, they would feel an adopted child would be ruined with homosexual parents as opposed to heterosexual parents. However, an LGBT+ couple raising an adopted child is just the same as adoption from a regular heterosexual couple. What matters most is a foster child being loved and taken care of by loving parents regardless of the parents' sexual orientation. So don't fret over a child being raised and protected by queer parents. Parenting is about raising and protecting children, and sexual orientation of the parents is a non-factor.
Don't believe me regarding LGBT couples? Check this video out:
If you are a couple looking to start a family but may not want to make children of your own, if you accept the financial and legal and social challenges of adoption; then surely adopt if your heart desires. Just like any average parenting, adoptive parenting is a lifelong responsibility. So be ready for a long time of protecting and nurturing a foster care child if you are so inclined to be foster parents.
I have some final thoughts to share, so go to the next section.
Adoption: Final Thoughts
Adoption is a way of giving children another chance at life apart from their troubled biological parents. Adopting children incorporates a number of challenges of the financial, legal, and social (and sometimes religious) variety. Adopted children can have a chance to be part of a different sort of lifestyle and home apart from their troubled past. There are risks involved in parents who wish to adopt children, but the main goal is to continue to nurture and groom children whereas their biological parents failed to do so. Even if you are an LGBT couple, you can still choose to be loving parents for a foster care child. Being great parents has nothing to do with sexual orientation- being great parents is about being there for children in all aspects of life regardless of the sexual orientation of the parents.
Parenting is about working together for the sake of children. Whereas one's biological family may have failed in raising and nurturing a child, an adoptive family can help provide children a second (and maybe more than second) chance to be taken take care of and loved. Adoptive parenting is a risk and a challenge that can go a long way to help children whom otherwise may not get such opportunities again in their lives. You don't have to be perfect; you just have to be a parent.
That concludes my blog post about adopting children. Hopefully I may have inspired future parents to consider adoption. I may add resources about adoption in my "Helpful Resources" page in the future. For now, though, I am glad you can read my post and gain some more life insight as I provide per usual here. If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.
If you feel like a hopeless and worthless failure, you are told to have hit "rock bottom." Being in rock bottom means you have hit one of the lowest points of your life, and it can be tough to get back to a happier place. I will use this blog post to talk about experiencing rock bottom and how you can get out of it.
Rock Bottom
When you feel buried in failure and disappointment, you feel further into the earth. The deeper you go, the more likely you may start feeling and seeing the rocks below. Rock bottom is basically that feeling. In my own life, I felt I have experienced feeling buried into the earth from constant and consistent disappointment. Some people just feel like all they are good for is nothing. Some people may even experience things like panic attacks or anxiety attacks when at rock bottom. In extreme cases, people who hit rock bottom may be violent- to the point of wanting to injure someone, or even kill someone... even oneself.
No one should ever have to feel like they have hit rock bottom. Unfortunately, there will be a time or times where you've hit your lowest point and are struggling trying to get your footing back. The first thing I would think about is to take account of what is actually bringing you down. For when I felt like I was at rock bottom, it was the feeling of being seen and treated as a failure by someone whom I try to get in one's good graces. Consider other factors as to why you feel you hit rock bottom. Try to find solutions to whatever issues you are experiencing. Finally, try to get the help you need or maybe execute better with your life.
You can hit rock bottom, but you don't have to remain at rock level of your life. Everyone deserves to live their best life and make the most of what opportunities are offered. Whether or not you believe in spiritual guidance, prayer also helps you to feel more confident. Just do whatever you can to get out of rock bottom status. Most of all..
Good luck!
I have to bring up these topics because life happens. As depressing as these topics are, I feel we need to do a lot more to help make life better for others. So I hope you can appreciate my efforts to discuss depressing topics and try to offer solutions or guidance. If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.
"John's Life Space" turned five years old on November 8, 2008. I felt this was an opportunity to discuss this blog's success and what I want for this blog moving forward. I am sorry I did not post this entry on this blog's anniversary, but I made this post anyways to reflect on this blog of mine. So welcome to "John's Life Space" and another post on here!
Five Years of John's Life Space
Prior to "John's Life Space," I would post a host of life issues in my main blog, "John's Blog Space." I felt I needed a proper blog to discuss life issues and only life issues. I even try to find different ways to discuss different issues. After my grandmother passed away four days before releasing this blog, I decided to devote this blog and its content in loving memory of my grandmother. I want to make "John's Life Space" a safe space and positive space for discussing all kinds of life issues. So do not feel bad or punished being here.
A lot of what I discuss are based on thoughts of mine, but a lot of other issues are based on personal experiences. I have no shame in admitting I have done foolish things. I have no shame in admitting I have failed in points where I could have done much better. Whereas some people would see it as showing weakness or only posting for oneself about life issues, I see it as a chance to get real. Not everything has to be portrayed with some song followed by some dancing or acting. Sometimes, boring English tells the tale better than any short online video.
I sometimes have posted blog entries as a means of helping others by releasing my own bottled-up emotions. I tend to be someone who tries to feel better by releasing my frustrations in hopes I can relieve others of their own frustrations. I just want to make life better for myself and others.
Even though I try to offer advice on various life issues, I am not an expert at these things. I am dealing with a lot of the different issues others may be facing. I am trying to help people win their battles over life issues while trying to win my own battles with my own life issues. We are all in this together. I often feel bad about my own life issues as I try to make life better for others. It speaks to the level of strength I have in trying to get over these various issues.
The motto to this blog is simple- "Life happens." Life indeed happens. All the posts that are a part of this blog help us realize that life happens.
Mental Health Focus.
Mental health has become a serious factor over the years. I felt it was important to key in on mental health issues because a lot of us can feel horrible about our lives, but our mental health can play an influence in bringing us down. Some people may be absolutely amazing but are let down by their mental health. Do we condemn these people and everything they stand for? No. We instead need to help these people and instill hope.
A lot of the issues on "John's Life Space" pertains to certain mental health issues. So I feel we really need to consider and respect peoples' mental health situation. Do NOT let people suffer and feel horrible- instead, let's try to HELP people! You may not know or realize how much people may be hurting. It is important we try to help people feel better and happy. I am trying to do what I can.
Helpful Resources and LGBT+ Resources.
While I haven't gotten much feedback regarding my life issues posts, the most successful aspect of "John's Life Space" is the inclusion of Helpful Resources and LGBT+ Resources. I started my Helpful Resources page on July 21, 2021. I felt the need to include online resources to various issues to help people in different ways. You could find almost anything about online videos or the latest memes. However, what about things that REALLY matter? Like- help regarding abuse, addiction, bullying, relationships, and more? This is where I try to offer some support. I am often contacted regarding resource to help people with whatever life issues they want some resources for. I feel this has been the most successful part of my life issues blog. Though I do love this aspect, I want others to also look at my past blog posts for more insight.
You can say whatever you want about the LGBT+ community. I felt like the LGBT+ community isn't as respected as much because people don't really understand LGBT+. Some people just completely dislike the LGBT+ community and its beliefs altogether. No matter where you stand regarding the LGBT+ community, I included a new "LGBT+ Resources" community to help people better understand LGBT+ as well as get resources. While I do not admit being among the LGBT+ community, I am an LGBT+ ally and am highly supportive and understanding of the LGBT+ community. How does the LGBT+ Resources work? Well, pretend you have special feelings or romantic interests in a same-sex partner. You may want to say your romantic interests are bisexual, pansexual, or even asexual. You may even not feel happy with your current gender and decide to go the transgender route. Maybe you don't believe in gender at all; and you therefore consider yourself gender non-binary, gender non-conforming, genderfluid, or anything like that. Maybe you are the parent of an LGBT child or children, perhaps a child who is gay/lesbian or feels he/she was born in the wrong body and wants to have transgender surgery and therapy. Rather than feel ashamed for being LGBT+, you should get certain resources to take a look at to help answer your LGBT-related concerns. So on June 1, 2022; I released my LGBT+ Resources page to assist EVERYONE- not just the LGBT community.
One other important thing to note is that all material I find and feature are meant to be about factual and useful material. I try not to post anything that is comedic, derogatory, anything that is sexually arousing, and things of that nature. I also try not to post material that leads to suspicious websites or spam. I always review any resources suggested to me. I want people to get the resources they want to use and utilize without the fear of being short-changed. Not every resource suggested gets featured. I may decide a certain resource may not fit the scope of life issues or LGBT+ resources. I may instead add those resources to a different blog of mine or disapprove it altogether. For example, if someone contacts me about suggesting a life issues resource about an online fashion retailer, I may add it to my fashion/beauty blog (StyleSpace, by John B. Marine). I recommend people who suggest a resource tell me what category the resource should fall under so it becomes easier for me to put it in a certain category. I may add a new category if I feel it deserves its own place. Some resources may even be included in more than one category.
Future Plans and Considerations.
I hope to keep posting more topics on "John's Life Space." I want people to feel like they are getting help and guidance when they visit this blog. I don't get any real feedback except for suggested resources. Please don't stop suggesting legitimate and useful resources. I want to help everyone, even including the LGBT+ community. So keep suggesting me resources so I can help other people. Also, don't forget to read my blog posts for more information on certain topics. You may even suggest future topics I can try to help people with. If you are interested in making Guest Posts in my blog, be sure to contact me on that, and I will remind my audience these are guest posts and will offer the proper crediting.
I do not employ tactics of cyber begging, but I would appreciate trying to find ways to financially profit from my work without feeling like I'm ripping people off. So if you're inclined, I would appreciate if you can donate financially to me. Donations are voluntary (not required) but would be appreciated. Please support my work any way you can if you appreciate my efforts.
Thank you for your support over the years!
If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.
WARNING:The following topic may not be suitable for all audiences. Due to the subject matter of this topic, viewer discretion is advised. Parents of younger children will need to restrict or limit younger viewers from viewing this material. Otherwise, you are reading this material at your own risk.
As someone who watches a lot of online videos and live streams, I am used to the occasional swearing people make. While I don't make a big deal about swearing, I do often wonder if people feel turned off by such swearing. So for this blog post, I want to discuss swearing. Is it okay to swear? Is there a time and place for swearing? I will share my thoughts through the course of this blog post.
BEFORE I BEGIN...
(1) This blog post is not intended to show my thoughts on people who swear either rarely or often. I am just here to discuss swearing on a journalistic, factual perspective. I am also not here to shame anyone who constantly swears.
(2) Because this is a rather sensitive topic, you are reading about this matter at your own risk. So be ready for some bad language expressed in this post.
Swearing
When I was growing up, saying a *bad word* would get me spanked by my parents. Back in school, students would be shocked if someone out loud bursts a swear word. Saying bad words back when I was growing up in elementary school would get you into some trouble for being a "potty mouth." A lot of video games and computer games today have a handful of bad language that may be used. Of course, there are a lot of songs that have their fair share of foul language. Take it from me- someone who grew up listening to hip-hop. I heard songs and skits where "motherfucker" is said at least five times in one song or skit. Television and movies also have their handful of mild to strong language. To some people, swearing is just words and not meant to hurt anyone. However, such language isn't tolerated by some people and in some audiences. While you can not regulate swearing entirely, there are cases where a slip of the tongue can result in hearing a bad language word unintentionally or accidentally.
While the need to swear is not necessarily a bad thing, where and when you do so matters. Swearing is mostly okay around friends casually communicating. If around children or in some kind of religious setting, swearing is frowned upon. It can be very easy to poison peoples' minds and ears with a well-timed swear session.
Levels of Swearing.
Swearing can come in different levels. To prevent saying certain powerful swear words, some will use other terms to prevent saying *those words." We all are used to a lot of them. For instance, we will use words like "darn" or "dang" to avoid saying "damn." Recent times have seen "bad ass" or "badass" being used a lot. Some people even use "AF" or "A.F." to avoid saying "_____ as fuck." Such as in the case of "feminist AF." Hearing the occasional "F-bomb" happens.
Here are examples of certain swear words that showcase the extent of what swearing can be like:
* MILD SWEARING: damn (except for dams or "Van Dam"), hell, ass (when used offensively), piss
* MODERATE SWEARING: bitch (when used offensively), bastard (when used offensively), ho/hoe/whore (when used offensively)
* STRONG SWEARING: fuck or motherfucker/motherfucking, shit, dick (when used offensively or sexually), pussy (when used offensively or sexually), (almost any derogatory term or expression)
Hearing or seeing such words can bring others to cringe a bit.
More Examples of Swearing.
One time, I saw a boy maybe between the ages of 5-12 wear an athletic T-shirt that said "All Damn Day." There would be no way I would allow my children (if I had any) that young to wear a shirt like that. I even saw someone's car have a sticker on it saying "twins up in this bitch." This is rather unnecessary swearing there, despite the comedic value. One fashion blogger I follow rarely swore, until she started swearing a bit more in her blog posts to vent anger.
When I think of some people who change up their lives as they get older, one such entity is one of my favorite recording artists- Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift started out as a country cutie circa 2008. Rarely did she drop any bad language. Later in her career going from country pop to traditional pop, Taylor would have some songs with a little mild language. Then into her 30s, she began to swear more frequently and often in her songs. Thankfully, Taylor doesn't immaturely or casually swears to others. So someone can go from purely innocent to vastly offensive language-wise throughout one's life.
Swearing can also be a factor in love and relationships. Some may find it discerning when one's partner constantly swears. It may be a turn-off to some people to have a partner who swears often.
Moderators on live streams or online channels often filter out words that seem offensive. Some words get Auto-Modded when they are not meant to be used in a certain sense. So you have to be careful in some chat settings that you don't say anything that can draw the attention of moderators or have some censorship.
I often feel some people liberally swear just to show their community is not G-rated or for a general audience. Someone may also implement some kind of swearing or sexual innuendo to market to a more mature audience. Sometimes, these can be unnecessary and unintentional implementations of mature content. For a lot of Twitch channels and YouTube live streamers, the usual assumption is that one is 13 years or older when viewing certain channels. Some even are 18+ channels or have mature streams. In these environments, swearing can become more frequent.
My Own Swearing Experiences and Thoughts.
I don't make a big deal about swearing because I'm used to it and don't mind it. Though sometimes, I do feel that swearing when you don't need to or don't have to can sometimes be an annoyance. I will only swear when I am completely angry or frustrated about something. For example, I'd swear to myself if my beloved sports team gets scored on. I would also swear if I am having a disgusting day where nothing seems to go right. However, I wouldn't go casually swearing when I am communicating with others on social media or making some videos. It was kind of the way I was raised.
On the same note, I don't refer to my own Black people as (the N-word) as a form of endearment in the sense of, "my (N-word)." I just don't casually curse or feel like I casually curse just to show my material is not meant for a general audience. I feel swearing can only draw some people away or make some people want to cover the ears of younger people. Swearing is only acceptable to me if warranted or for comedic purposes. Just doing it casually and when not needed just seems immature and can be a turn-off.
How about we go with some Final Thoughts on this matter? Next section coming up...
Swearing: Final Thoughts
Eveyone uses swear words for all kinds of situations and for all kinds of purposes. Whether or not you approve or disapprove of this is not the point of this blog post. I simply wanted to discuss how and why we swear and use swear words. I am around lots of people who have no problem swearing up and down, sometimes unnecessarily. I am no hypocrite or anything in preferring people who casually swear more than those who only rarely or moderately swears. My blogs are fairly general audience, but even I had to break a few rules to discuss this topic to you all.
If you swear often, that is fine. If you rarely swear, that is also fine. Swearing should mostly be like consuming alcohol or using tobacco- best in moderation. However, life your life the way you choose to live life. If people disapprove, let them be. Just do you.
This was a rather rough topic, but I often have to discuss rough and discomforting topics to express points. So if you enjoy my work and want more of it, please be sure to follow my work in any such capacity. Contact me if you have any ideas for future topics or to pitch certain legitimate offers to me. If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.
There will come a time where we reach a breaking point that drives us into a state of madness or a loss of control. When that moment happens, we enter a moment where we psychologically break down and in worse cases, experience body pains and anguish that drive us over the edge. Such attacks can last from a few minutes to even up to a half hour or longer. When faced with these moments of vulnerability and weakness, we are powerless to do anything about it. While I don't have any helpful advice, I at least want to discuss this matter with you all.
Anxiety Attacks and Panic Attacks
Though anxiety attacks and panic attacks seem the same, they are actually two different, yet similar things. Such moments in life can lead us to feeling broken down and weak. How we handle ourselves despite these moments can help determine whether or not we get through these attacks quickly or over time.
An anxiety attack stems from a brief moment that makes someone break down physically and mentally. An anxiety attack can be something triggered inside of us. These attacks can make anyone feel broken down and rendered helpless. People who suffer from anxiety may have a moment where are unable to perform and focus. The height of anxiety can come in the form of an anxiety attack. Certain techniques can help to ease anxiety attacks before they get potentially worse.
A panic attack, however, can be more serious. Panic attacks happen in much the same way as anxiety attacks, but effects such as nausea, shortness of breath, sweating, and more can result from a moment that brings fear. Panic attacks can happen without any trigger or warning. It is almost as if the mind decides when to get someone in fight-or-flight mode.
Either of these moments can make all of us be vulnerable at any given moment. At worst, having these attacks can lead to us being in an unstable condition or even lead us to hurt (or even kill) ourselves or others. This is very much a potentially serious situation that needs to be addressed.
Triggers of Anxiety Attacks and Panic Attacks.
Some people develop these triggers based on what is going on in their lives, certain mindsets people have, pressure to perform, and things of that nature. When there is a moment that brings us to insanity, we often act in ways that bring us down. Two serious triggers can also include not knowing what to think anymore or fear of impending doom. Someone may also have these attacks in the wake of feeling like you let a loved one down. In the wake of the COVID-19/Coronavirus pandemic, such mental issues can also form from all of the restrictions and such from this pandemic.
In these cases, it is important to try to recognize these triggers and try to find a way to restore control in the event of such attacks.
Treatment for Anxiety Attacks and Panic Attacks.
Self-treating anxiety attacks and panic attacks can be difficult. What you can you is practice breathing exercises, eat food or drink water. You may want to pull over if you are operating a vehicle and experience an anxiety attack or a panic attack. If someone of legal age is with you as you operate a vehicle, have that person take over duties. If you can and if you are able to, you may even exercise to try to bring yourself together better.
If panic attacks happen, medicine may be taken to lessen the effects of whatever is causing the panic attack. If you fear you may have panic disorder, you may want to consult with your doctor, as you may be facing serious physical and mental breakdown. Medicine can help to ensure your body and your mind remain intact.
It may also help to consult a psychotherapist for your anxiety or panic issues. See if you can schedule sessions to talk out your issues with a psychotherapist or any other mental health professional.
The most important thing to remember is that you will get through most any anxiety attack or panic attack. It is very unlikely one will die from an anxiety attack or a panic attack.
Let me try to offer Final Thoughts.
Panic Attacks and Anxiety Attacks: Final Thoughts
Life is tough as it is. Having to deal with panic attacks and anxiety attacks is equally tough. We all have our moments where panic or anxiety strikes us. Whether they last for a few minutes or over an hour, they do put an impact on our mental well-being. If you suffer from panic disorder (or even anxiety disorder), you may want to meet with your doctor to possibly get some medication to treat your disorder. The most important thing to remember is that you can't die from these attacks. You will get through anxiety attacks and panic attacks. Just be sure to take it easy and seek help when you can.
When I post topics like this, either they are based on thoughts of mine or on recent experiences in my life. Even if I don't go into details about most personal issues, I do have my fair share of issues. I want to try to help anyone who reads my blog posts. Hopefully I have helped someone through the means of blogging. If you enjoy my work, please Subscribe/Follow my blog(s) in any capacity if you love my work and want to support me any way you can. Share my blog post(s) with others if you enjoy my work. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.
Minimalism is about less is more. Minimalism involves downsizing. The idea is to live your best life having as little as possible. Can you live your best life without having a whole lot? This "John's Life Space" post involves minimalism. I will even share my own insights towards developing this mindset. I am not here to convince you to live minimalist, but I am providing insight on minimalism if you are considering living a minimalist lifestyle or want some insight on minimalism.
Minimalism
In most cases, having so little is usually grounds for having sympathy for others. It makes people want to pour into their resources and try to help people whom they feel are struggling in life. However, minimalism is not like that. Minimalism is about having so few resources yet still living a perfectly fine life.
We have grown as a culture to where having a big living space, having a significant other, and establishing a family makes someone a success in society. When someone lives with so less, some people think they are failures and probably wished they would live the lives of what society deems successful. Some people who live a minimalist lifestyle have all they need and do not have to have loads of money and resources to be happy. It is because some people make changes to themselves and their lives to live happily while not having the best of everything. Such people realize what makes them happy, and they don't rely on having a materialistic mindset to be happy.
When someone does not have all kinds of goods that give status, does it mean someone simply is not successful? Absolutely not. I can speak from personal experience. I honestly never felt bad because I wasn't wearing Nike sneakers or have a Starter jacket unlike other school students. I did not feel required to have what everyone else had in order to feel happy. I was okay having knock-off goods. At least I had certain goods. As I look at the idea of minimalism, I would be greatly served having some of the cheapest material as long as it lasted. I didn't care if I wasn't wearing Nike sneakers or have a Starter jacket. At least I had clothes.
NOTE:Now before I go into further detail, I want to advise everyone that living a minimalist lifestyle does NOT mean people are failures. Minimalist people are not those who failed to live the American dream (at least here in the United States of America). I am not suggesting minimalist types need help. I am just here to discuss minimalist culture.
Why Minimalism?
I will give you a lot of thoughts about minimalism to help prove my points on minimalism. Check it...
Someone would want to imagine what the big deal is with minimalism. Well for a lot of people, having the best of everything does not equate to happiness. When you really think about it, a lot of things we are blessed with or have are not exactly REQUIRED to live our best lives. Some things are almost merely non-essential to our survival. We don't care about that often times, but it is true.
Minimalism can pertain to not being flashy or boisterous. Would you rather drive a basic economy car all in stock form, or would you drive an economy car that has flashy graphics and various aesthetic arrangements (such as body kits, spoilers, etc.)? To the minimalist, an economy car is all someone needs. A minimalist is not at all concerned about being under pressure to the better furnishings to compete with other people. A minimalist may also prefer having bland-looking resources rather than flashy look-at-me resources.
As a sometimes fashion/beauty blogger (PLUG: Visit my fashion/beauty blog! Here: StyleSpace, by John B. Marine :) ), I hear of fashionistas who have a capsule wardrobe to express minimalism. This is where fashionable types get rid of clothes they don't really need or like much and instead stick with favorites. Fashionable types still want a decent wardrobe, but they want to do so without having to shop for new clothes all the time. So a minimalist in this regard will stick to a certain set wardrobe.
Believe it or not, long before I considered the layout of my blogs and some of my other social media material, I had minimalism in mind. I feel I can market myself without having a lot of fancy things. I am proud to have online material that are not filled with bloated nonsense. I also believe in minimalism when I do my videos online. I never had the best of the best, yet I made the most of what little I have. A fancy looking blog will get more attention than a bland one, but I always believed in quality over quantity.
Hopefully this section gives you some ideas on how a minimalist may think.
Minimalism Inspiration: Teemaree.
I want to offer a real example to help express the concept of minimalism. Teemaree, once a veteran of various forms of entertainment as well as being a spokeswoman, had achieved loads of success. She was also one of my favorite go-go dancers. She even spearheaded a first-of-its-kind reality show about the go-go dancing lifestyle. One would think someone like Teemaree is head and shoulders above her peers with this much success. Well, Teemaree admits she was mostly trapped and needed guidance. So what she did was a lot of deep thinking and faith. Today, Teemaree is a life coach, author, and creator of "Transform With Teemaree," "Invite God In," and "ALLSWELL Lifestyle." Her life coaching is a mix of offering life advice as well as providing religious insight. Speaking of Teemaree's insight, let me share this with you:
Teemaree isn't the only example of minimalist lifestyle. She is the best example to me to discuss minimalism that I can provide. I am using Teemaree as an example to help set up discussion minimalism using a real-life example.
Minimalism: How to Start?
Minimalism is not something that can be easily implemented. I do not know all of the nuances of minimalism, but I may help you get started. I will share some of my own minimalist insights and thoughts to help give you some inspiration if you want to take on a minimalist lifestyle. Follow my lead...
Minimalism: What Do You Need?
The first thing to consider about minimalism is to think about what you have and what you need. Especially if you are going to live "off the grid," you have to seriously consider what things are important to you in the moment. You will have to learn to sacrifice some comforts in trying to live the minimalist life you wish to live.
If I lived as a minimalist, I am very involved in technology. So what I would need is powerful WiFi Internet. I want to hold onto my two TVs, my HDTV monitor, my printer, and my Chromebook. I may even want to go from a PC to a decent-spec laptop. If I had the money, I'd invest in an HP laptop that costs around $500 USD (or maybe $600 USD) that has better specifications than my 2014-ish budget PC. A lot of space on my desktop would be gone, and I could use it around the house even if power goes out. As a gamer, I want to hold onto my systems. I don't need a gaming PC when I can do just fine with a simple PC or laptop that can still play a good amount of games while also serving as my personal PC/laptop when not gaming. I would want to cook with a microwave and an air fryer. I would want a place with decent lighting. I feel lighting lightens my mood.
Most important about minimalism is making money. You need to find some sort of revenue stream or grind to stay financially afloat. There isn't much I do to generate income. So in this regard, I would struggle unless I had some proper form of making money.
You also must consider utilities. If you can invest in solar power, it would be cleaner for the environment and possibly even energy efficient. You also need decent plumbing to handle things like taking baths and showers as well as washing dishes. If you plan on getting into farming, you certainly need to consider decent utilities for planting gardens and such.
Minimalism can be a challenge if you have a significant other and/or a family. Be mindful of needs for you as a couple and in maintaining a family when being minimalist. You have to account for taking care of your lover/spouse in addition to your family should you choose to live as a minimalist couple or as a minimalist family.
These are just a number of things to think about when wanting to think minimalist.
Minimalism: Where Would You Live?
Do you prefer living within the big city, living in the suburbs of a major city, or out in the country? Do you even want to live in your current state or country or move elsewhere? You want to be able to live in a place where you can comfortably live your life. The popularity of tiny houses these days make for a unique challenge of trying to live without having to pay high mortgage rates. You would be surprised at how some people maximize their lives living minimalist style. If you do think about the tiny house lifestyle or convert a van or bus into a home, that is something else to consider your minimalist lifestyle in.
I have seen people live in places ranging from tiny homes to vehicles converted into homes. This even includes people who have trailer homes. If I had one such home, I kind of would want a two-story home to possibly enjoy great views and maybe even sit on the balcony outside. Because I am so much of a city person, I feel an affordable housing option within an uptown setting or downtown setting would be the best for me. I wouldn't want to shy too far away from family and friends here in Houston. Look around on various tiny home retailers and builders to think about your minimalist lifestyle.
Minimalism: Sacrifices.
Just like almost anything in life, you have to learn to make sacrifices. A lot of the luxuries you are accustomed to can be given up to live the minimalist lifestyle. Even though air conditioning seems necessary, it is actually a luxury. Living here in Texas, I can't afford to sweat in all of this Texas heat! So I would need a great solution for air conditioning.
If you are the materialistic type, you have to realize some goods you enjoy aren't always goods you NEED. Fashionistas- that means you can do without Louboutin pumps, Michael Kors handbags, Chanel espadrilles, and various other luxury goods.
Most importantly, the biggest move you can make in adopting minimalism is to drop your materialistic lifestyle. Minimalism forces you to think less about owning everything and only focus on essentials. You can live better by understanding the essentials rather than feel like you need material goods to be happy. I will leave this discussion with a little quote:
"You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"
-Steven Wright
I want to present some Final Thoughts on this topic to close out my minimalism discussion. Please look at the next section.
Minimalism: Final Thoughts
Minimalism is about living your best life having only so many resources. Minimalists shouldn't be seen as those who fail in life; instead, minimalists are more concerned with making the most out of live by having the least of resources. Do not think a minimalist has given up on life or should be living a luxurious lifestyle. In fact, a lot of minimalist types have all they need to live a great life. They just do not need status symbols to prove their worth to the world. They also do not need status symbols to be happy with their lives.
A minimalist does not need help; minimalists just choose to live their lives without many of the luxuries many of us consider essential. While minimalists try to live with less, they don't need help or need to get psychological help. If you are a minimalist, you don't need a mansion, expensive cars, fancy gadgets, and the like to live happily. You live on bare essentials. Minimalism allows you to focus on more important things without being bombarded with many [usually unnecessary] things.
If you do choose to live a minimalist life, you need to plan carefully. Think about all of your immediate needs and wants. It is not easy to live a minimalist lifestyle without actually planning ahead. Be prepared to make sacrifices and let go of things you don't think are essential to you. Adjusting from normal life to minimalist life will NOT be an easy transition. However, moving to minimalism or tiny living is possible and doable.
Minimalists have not given up on life or need help; they just are living with as few resources as possible based on their needs. Not everyone is successful with the amount of money they have or the goods they own. They don't need outside help or sympathy for living a simple lifestyle devoid of status symbols. Minimalists just simply make "less is more" work. When you think about it, we do not need too much to live our best lives and to be happy. If we were not so fixated on having certain goods and resources to be happy, life can be much more enjoyable than what many of us make it out to be. Minimalists should be commended for helping a lot of us realize this about life in this regard. So if you are considering going minimalist, good for you! Minimalism is the best way to admire and appreciate what it really takes to live happily and freely.
Extra Resources.
I mentioned Teemaree earlier. If you are interested in learning more about Teemaree in regards to minimalism and minimalistic living, please visit her website at teemaree.com, and (optional) tell her John Marine sent you! :) You may also visit Teemaree's YouTube channel for more advice and insight.
That was really the only resource I can provide. I may open up a section regarding living different lifestyles in my "Helpful Resources" page. I hope you found something useful with this blog post.
That is all for this blog post. If you want to discuss, here is my question for you:
Would you consider living a minimalist lifestyle? Could you survive as a minimalist?
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Various Helpful Resources
This section includes a variety of different resources to cater to a number of different situations. Use this area to connect with various resources and services to help you with whatever issues you may have.
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Thank you for visiting! More resources will be made available in case I have some more attention to this blog.
Positive People and Positive Places
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