Players

Players lift the romantic hopes of single individuals, only to dump them at the peak of their happiness. They are unwilling to engage in proper relationships; uncommitted to marry or start a family with the ones getting played. These heartbreaking schemes are enough to send single people into depression. This blog post focuses on players in relationships.

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Players

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Let me set the mood of this post with a song. Let's this one started:


^ 112 player

Players in relationships try to win the hearts of single types, only to break their hearts afterwards. They are uncommitted to want to be with someone. All a player wants to do is pretend to want to be with someone only to break that person's heart when he/she is at the climax of happiness of wanting to be with a player. Normally, one would think someone wants to be with somebody else by trying to win the heart of a single person. No one would want to expend so much energy and interest in a single person just to play with one's emotions. A player does not consider (or care) about long-term love of someone. They just want to play up someone's romantic interests and move on to another individual.

Players are frowned upon because they know how to easily win the hearts of others while having little or no interest in wanting to have a committed relationship with such individuals. Certain single types easily fall victim to the tactics of a player that any dreams of marriage or even starting a family with that individual become dashed. We normally think people want to be romantically involved with others would want to engage in any number of things to show love. Committed and interested types would want to engage in acts like wanting to marry, wanting to start a family, and of course... intimacy. Players, however, are only satisfied when they feel they have won the heart of someone only to crush someone's happiness in short order at the peak of one's happiness. Almost as if winning one's heart gives a player serious leverage of wanting to do whatever he/she wants with someone's heart once they've gotten it.

Why Do Players Play?

Players often play with the hearts of others mostly for self-gratitude and confidence. They feel happy and confident knowing they can manipulate other peoples' emotions, trying to uplift others' spirits only to crush those spirits when they feel the climax of one's spirits have been reached. It is this sort of empowerment that gives players such confidence to play almost anyone they want. On the other hand, it speaks to the level of incompetence of players simply not knowing what they want. Players do not know who they want to be with, if they want to really be with someone. So to feel happy, they try to *pretend* to want to be in a committed relationship only to break others' hearts later on. Players don't know what they want in relationships or who they want to be with, so they want to pass the time by falsely uplifting the loving spirits of single people.

Those who have been played likely can't believe they allowed themselves to be taken advantage of so easily. That feeling of no longer being single end up burning to ashes thanks to a player and his/her playing tactics. Returning to being single after being previously taken only brings people to depression and dissatisfaction after being so betrayed.

Are You With a Player?

You might be dealing with a player if that person does not seem to really want you romantically for the long haul. We normally want to forever be with someone whom we is so committed and wanting to love for a long time. A player is just disinterested in wanting to be in any kind of long-running, committed relationship. So if you sense you may be with a player, it may be time for you to move on or hope the player changes his/her ways.

How to Deal With Being Played.

If your plans of wanting to be with someone are dashed by a player, you obviously will feel heartbroken. Best thing you can pretty much do is seek someone more willing and more able to be with you and connect with you than what a player did. Be sure to find someone who you can better connect with and not feel you are being taken advantage.

Can a Player Change His/Her Ways?

It is possible a player may ultimately decide to want to be with someone. However, the chances are usually not as likely unless the player himself/herself completely changes his/her habits and decide to get serious about being in committed relationships. This is something the player has to chance on his/her own.


Final thoughts on haters coming up in the next section.

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Players: Final Thoughts

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A player is unable and incapable of wanting to start a proper relationship with someone. Players simply lift the spirits of single people just to make them believe they found the right one... only to have their hearts broken when they get dumped by players. A player thinks it is perfectly acceptable to try to win a single person's heart only to crush that person's heart at the climax of love and satisfaction. They do so knowing they have no confidence in themselves of wanting to be in any committed relationship. If someone is truly committed to be with someone, people shouldn't have to go to the levels of pretending to want to have any committed relationship with someone. Dealing with a player can be depressing once one's heart has been broken by a player. Those looking for love should find someone whom they feel most compatible with and not willing to break someone's heart at a given notice. Players are indecisive, uncommitted, and even unsure enough to not want to seek a proper relationship. If you're going to be in any kind of relationship, be in it for the long haul, the long distance, and with totally sincere love. DON'T be a player unless you really don't know how to properly love someone and want to commit.





This post on players is over. Maybe you have some thoughts on this matter:

How do you deal with players? Have you been played before by one, maybe?

Be sure to take a look at my other blog posts and other material while you are in my realm. I am also pleased for those of you to offer relevant resources for my "Helpful Resources" page on "John's Life Space." I can always use more resources to feature for those online to aid in assistance for many life issues. So connect with me any way you can. As for this post, I'm done. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my official website at johnbmarine.com, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin!
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Body Shaming

Criticism of peoples' bodies is known as body shaming. This sort of discrimination can bring people to depression. Being too overweight or underweight is grounds for people to shame others. Body shaming is the topic at hand here, and I will be discussing body shaming from not only fat shaming, but also skinny shaming.

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Body Shaming

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When people criticize others for being skinny or obese, this leads to body shaming. Body shaming makes people feel worthless because people are only being seen for their body size rather than their personality. Someone criticized for being too thin are often seen like stick figures to some people. Likewise, someone criticized for being too overweight or obese are seen more as blobs of body fat rather than average human beings. Body shaming hurts people physically, and even mentally. No one wants to be criticized or judged upon only by their body size. Someone who may be attacked regarding body size can develop a lack of self-esteem. In most other cases, body shaming can lead to unhealthy changes to peoples' lifestyles- even including eating more and increased levels of depression. So you could be making someone's body and weight issues WORSE if you are trying to help him/her!

Body acceptance is a means of accepting your body regardless of what society or others think is beautiful. It means you are proud of your body even if your body isn't what most people consider normal or acceptable. It reduces feeling it is required you keep your body at a healthy weight and size just to live better or be better appreciated among people. One thing I have appreciated among fashion bloggers (especially among plus size fashion bloggers) is how they were able to appreciate their bodies even if they were not slim and slender.

Does someone have to have a healthy body size to be accepted? Doctors often recommend people maintain a healthy weight. Does that mean they are REQUIRED to be at a certain weight? No. We all need to maintain a healthy weight regardless, but we shouldn't criticize people who are north or south of what is considered ideal or normal in terms of bodies and weight. Considering we celebrate and romanticize those who have what is considered perfect or average body weight, anything less than society's threshold of average can be considered unacceptable among most circles.

Body Shaming: Are We Hurting When We Could be Helping?

To some people, attacking someone for their body or body size is meant as a form of motivation to maintain a healthy weight. Those tactics, however, can actually do more harm than good. Think about what kind of message you are trying to send when you are trying to get people to maintain a healthy weight or lose/gain healthy weight by body shaming. There are more logical and helpful ways to motivate people to lose weight (or gain weight for skinnier types) or to help others maintain a healthy weight.

There are some people who actually promote and admire certain body types- even to the point of fetishes. Some people feel romantically aroused by certain body types. At times in my fashion/beauty blog, I was once criticized for unintentionally promoting obesity in discussing plus size fashion and even plus size modeling.


Now let's look at this from two different perspectives.

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Body Shaming: Skinny and Overweight

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There are two main aspects of body shaming- being too skinny and being too fat. Here is a look at body shaming in both of these respects.

Body Shaming: Fat Shaming.

More commonly, people who are either overweight or obese are subject to "fat shaming." When people are being "fat shamed," there are people who criticize overweight people others for being overweight. Some people believe fat shaming is a way to get overweight people to eat less, exercise more, and maintain a healthy weight for their height. Unfortunately, fat shaming can increase depression, lower self-esteem, cause some overweight types to eat more, make such people isolate themselves from others, increase depression, and maybe even lead to possible harm to themselves or others (including suicide and/or homicide).

I will go back to fashion and modeling examples. Nothing makes most people cringe than seeing an overweight or obese person show off their jiggling body fat or trying to fit into skinnier clothing. I've seen fashion plus size fashion bloggers and plus size models wear cropped tops, short outfits, and things of that nature. These types are meant to show that you can look and feel beautiful even if you do not have a body size that is considered normal or healthy. Even without having the most lustful bodies, I found various plus size models to be as beautiful as anyone with builds who may be slim or athletic. The trend these days is more like how those have praised females who are "thicc." In other words- those with thick thighs or have a body like Kim Kardashian. Some plus-size fashion bloggers (some use the term "fatshion" bloggers) sometimes post photos of themselves showing their bodies off to show body acceptance. A lot of people will feel disgusted and think obesity is being promoted. I've seen some plus-size models who have worn curvy lingerie and curvy swimsuits. The main point is to share that one who is overweight can still find good-looking, good-fitting clothes.

Regardless, being overweight or even obese is still grounds for some people to want to fat shame others. If trying to maintain or lose weight is the goal, do so in a healthy and ethical way. I always say you do not solve problems by adding to them. So be sure to help others in a non-destructive way. There is a such thing as constructive criticism. There have been individuals who have taken to the airwaves and through online videos doing fat shaming. Certain others

Fat Shaming: Video Insight
For some video insight on fat shaming, I have found some videos to prove points.

Here is a video that seems more an acting job, but its insight on fat shaming is real:

^ Mean Girl Fat Shames Stranger, Lives to Regret Her Decision | Dhar Mann

One YouTube personality shares her thoughts on fat shaming. I tried to find a fairly decent video regarding thoughts on fat shaming, and this was about as good as I could find:

^ What I think about Fat Shaming & Body Image Disorders

This concludes the discussion of fat shaming.

Body Shaming: Skinny Shaming.

While fat shaming is common, a lot of us realize that there is shaming on the other side of the spectrum- skinny shaming. We often admire and romanticize people who have slim and slender builds. We may even praise those who have athletic builds, or even people who are in modern lingo, "thicc." Either way, many consider being slim and slender to be healthier and more attractive than those who have excess body fat. Some skinny types can be dangerously thin. Such people can be almost basically bones with little muscles here and there. These are mostly the anorexic types.

As an example in fashion, many people have seen fashion models walk the runways at fashion shows. Some of them are incredibly slim. Sometimes even to the level where they seem to have more bones than muscles. Fashion agencies and modeling agencies have certain guidelines on body types. Being too skinny can be very unhealthy. People who criticize others for being too skinny often will say something like, "eat a cheeseburger" to someone who is very slim. There is one fashion personality I've followed in which some criticize her for being unhealthy skinny.

Skinny Shaming: Video Insight
This is an excellent video that highlights on skinny shaming from one person's perspective:

^ On The Other Side | Skinny Shaming Film

There is your skinny shaming insight. Some people don't even realize skinny shaming is just as damaging as fat shaming, and some people don't even regard or realize that skinny shaming is a thing.

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Body Shaming: Final Thoughts

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Regardless of whether or not someone is properly healthy, body shaming can be damaging. Our perception of body image usually clouds our thoughts of who people are on the inside. We instead focus on body image and decide to make comments that can actually be doing more harm than good. If motivation to lose or gain weight is the goal, do so in a healthy way without emotionally or mentally hurting someone. You can judge a person on almost anything and for whatever reason. None of those, though, has to involve body shaming. One's body is NOT a reflection of who someone is within. Even I have had my thoughts about people. I do know for all the reasons to love or loathe someone, weight and/or body image is NOT a factor and should not be a factor. I am not going to love someone because they have an overweight figure. Likewise, I am not going to love someone for having a very slender figure. Look beyond the body weight and body mass and appreciate people for their personality instead of body shaming. Body shaming is destructive and disespectful on a number of levels and does very little to motivate or compliment anyone.





Those are my thoughts on body shaming- both from an overweight and underweight perspective.

What are your thoughts on body shaming? Have you been body shamed before? How did you handle it, and what advice would you give if you been body shamed?

Be sure to visit my Helpful Resources page if you want online resources about a number of issues. This even includes resources regarding COVID-19/Coronavirus concerns. I want to thank those who provided their own resources in addition to me finding certain resources for various topics. Other than that, your visiting of my life issues blog is well appreciated. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my official website at johnbmarine.com, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin!
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Introverts and Extroverts

I never understood the difference between introverts and extroverts. Upon recent events in my life, I began to evaluate the two sides. This blog post is a discussion about being introverted and extroverted respectfully. I want to share with you the difference between the two as I know them to be. Perhaps you can determine whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, and also to find out which you consider yourself as. So allow me to welcome you to another "John's Life Space" blog post.

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Introverts and Extroverts

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Please remember- I am NOT an expert at this topic. I am only commenting based on what I know about this topic.

Whether or not someone is an introvert or an extrovert depends on how someone interacts with the world around them. An introvert is usually more reserved and private, and an extrovert usually is more alive and outgoing. How people handle certain aspects of life and certain situations can determine the difference of being either an introvert or an extrovert. As if you can't tell by the prefixes of "introvert" and "extrovert," you will note what the word means based on the "in-" and "ex-" prefixes. To understand these concepts further, we must look to the root words- introversion and extroversion. Here are some *official* definitions of each word:

Introversion Definition:

"(noun): the state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life"

-(Merriam-Webster Dictionary)

Extroversion Definition:

"(noun): the act, state, or habit of being predominantly concerned with and obtaining gratification from what is outside the self"

-(Merriam-Webster Dictionary)

So when you consider these two definitions, you can get a general understanding of what it means to be either an introvert or an extrovert. Not every introvert/extrovert is the same or 100% complete the general definition of either. It is much the same way that no two people exactly fit any sort of social category. It is much the same way how you have males who wear pink or females who take part in activities like contact sports or construction work.

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Analyzing Introverts and Extroverts

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This section features the finer details of being an introvert and an extrovert. Consider the following...

Are You an Introvert or Extrovert?

Let me try to explain the two sides as best as I can. First off, the introverts.

An introvert usually is seen as being reserved and not as outgoing. An introvert usually does not try to be boastful and always wanting to be out and about. Introverts even want to be alone to recharge themselves and to recover. They usually do not share their issues with others. Instead, these are people who act independently and prefer privacy over most things. A misconception about introverts is that they are rude and anti-social. Introverts are more self-reliant when dealing with certain issues.

An extrovert usually looks to others and is mostly outgoing. Such types are expressive and do not mind being among large crowds. They are more of team players than their introvert counterparts. They draw their energy from other people rather than rely on only a few certain individuals. They also tend to be the center of attention more than introverts. These are more the types that try to outsource things.

Ambiverts.

Maybe one is neither entirely an introvert nor an extrovert. So welcome the middle ground- the ambivert. An ambivert combines qualities of both introverts and extroverts but without being exclusive to either. Some may prefer to work alone but also am more open to working with other people and getting into social crowds. Once you realize what both introverts and extroverts are, you may realize you have qualities of both without having all of the qualities of either an introvert or an extrovert. In that case, consider yourself an ambivert!

Do I Identify as an Introvert or an Extrovert?

Personally, I tend to fit the bill as an introvert. A lot of what I do is independent. I also tend to want to be reserved and private for when experiencing tough times and need to recharge on my own. Though I am reserved, I used to look to guidance from others to try to get myself together when I am down. I also tend to be a deep thinker... often times over-thinking things. As much as I talk about certain places in the world I love and certain events I want to be a part of, I am actually not an outgoing person. I consider myself below average in trying to work in teams. I consider teamwork as one of my biggest weaknesses. So therefore, based on my research of introverts and extroverts, I seem best classified as an introvert.

Is It Good or Bad Being Either an Introvert or an Extrovert?

Being an introvert or an extrovert is only a bad thing if you consider one or the other to be a negative. Being an introvert or an extrovert just means you have different needs and strategies that have to be addressed properly to complete tasks. Even teams have to try to work together when you have both introverts and extroverts working on the same team trying to complete the same task or multiple tasks. So do not feel bad if you feel you are either an introvert or an extrovert. People are not going to require you to be either an introvert or extrovert. Likewise, people are not going to require you to convert to either an extrovert or introvert. Just work to your skills and personality. That is more important than anything else.

Video Insight.

I chose this video as a video example of distinguishing between introverts and extroverts:


^ Introverts vs Extroverts

Now let's talk care for both types.

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Caring For Introverts and Extroverts

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As introverts and extroverts have differing qualities, they also require different levels of care for when those are in need of support.

Introvert Care.

An introvert can be tough to negotiate with since they can be so reserved. An introvert may have certain issues and choose not to disclose their issues with others. Some introverts may try to self-treat their own issues rather than seek help. In a scary sense, some introverts may be so rebellious towards getting help that they may even engage in self-destruction or even suicide if they are unable to resolve their issues on their own. It is therefore helpful a person lets an introvert know he/she loves a certain introvert and wants the best for an introvert. It helps to be thoughtful and offer best wishes to an introvert dealing with any sort of issues.

Extrovert Care.

Extroverts often look to others for love and support rather than try to be independent. So therefore, being around others and gaining support from others is very beneficial to the extrovert. Extroverts whom may need help may have to be alone, just not for as long as introverts. Though extroverts tend to be more sociable, even extroverts suffer from social anxiety.


I wish I knew more about this topic to provide more accurate advice. Otherwise, that concludes this section. Maybe more complete advice could be offered in edits to this blog post. That said... let us end with some final thoughts, huh?

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Introverts and Extroverts: Final Thoughts

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Being an introvert or an extrovert is based entirely on how we tend to interact with the world as well as how we choose to take care of ourselves in completing tasks. I, at least, look at introverts and extroverts as different philosophies in accomplishing tasks, rather than praising one type and condeming the other. It is more important to understand your type to complete tasks rather than try to be an introvert or an extrovert. Naturally, many of us are the middle ground of introvert and extrovert. These are the ambiverts. As being an introvert or extrovert, you have different qualities and methods of handling work different from your counterparts. So be sure to address these concerns and try to find a way to work together to complete tasks. If you are trying to care for an introvert or an extrovert, it helps to have a general understanding of others' needs and traits. What may work to help an extrovert may not help an introvert. We all must do what we can to cater to and address the needs and wants of introverts and extroverts alike. Do not feel bad if you feel you have to be one or the other to be better accepted and to better accomplish tasks. Just do what you can and work to your own ability, and you'll do just fine.





This post is over. Thanks for dropping by! Let me ask you if you want to discuss this topic:

Do you consider yourself and introvert, an extrovert, or even an ambivert? Do you feel you need to be any of these to be successful in life and work?

Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my official website at johnbmarine.com, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin!
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Time to Move On

We all meet people whom who love to be around. Moments both good and bad materialize from your connection with others. Some of those bad times may lead you into some slumping times. In those times, you feel you must move on. When do you feel that moving on is the best way to feel better? I will try to discuss this matter in this blog post.

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Time to Move On

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Being in the company of others makes you feel happy and welcomed. I have been part of many communities in person and in cyberspace. I have known many people of various nationalities, ethnicity, and religions. At times, I even tried to adjust my behavior to better fit in with others. As much as I try to be part of other peoples' lives, I sometimes realize I can not please everyone. I may also feel as if my own standards don't entirely meet others. So I end up feeling unwanted and unloved. This is the start of feeling as if you must move on to try to feel better.

There have been a number of things I've tried to disconnect myself from in trying to move on from places where I used to feel like I was still a part of certain communities. I recently Unfollowed a Twitch channel I used to feel like I was a part of. It was with a lot of thought that I decided any sort of novelty has worn off. Because of this, I felt the best thing I could do was simply no longer join or follow a certain Twitch channel. Long before this recent incident, I had uninstalled and stop using Discord. This came from certain personal issues as well as (you guessed it) being part of a community I thought I was cool with. I was reserved about it, but I felt like I didn't belong in one community I was eventually permanently banned from. I also didn't use Discord too much to actually say I missed using it. These were not moments I was proud of. With that said, however, I felt my inability to actively stay involved with communities has led me to want to move on from communities where I felt unloved and no longer wanted.

As Leona Lewis once sang, "...it's gonna hurt, but it heals to." One does not want to break himself/herself away from others, but if you don't feel like you belong to a community or someone's life anymore, the best thing you can do is to simply move on. Enjoy the good times you've shared but move on to try to better your life. Do I still feel hurt even when I decide to no longer involve myself with certain communities? Absolutely. At the same time, however, I don't like being around people to where I feel I have no impact or can not try to be a part of any community. In no way do I consider myself anti-social. What I do have a problem with is in feeling my standards aren't good enough to be part of people who [I thought] I felt cool with. If I no longer feel welcome in communities or with people who I thought I was cool with, I can take my business elsewhere and look for other people to be around. I also at times try not to forget good people (or whom I perceive as good people) when I move on from others. I do wish things could have gone much better; but if I feel I can do better, I can and will decide to take my personality elsewhere.

Sometimes, the decision to move on comes from evaluating how I've felt lately being with certain communities and with certain people. I would come in and praise certain Twitch streamers, but I would then feel like I am disregarded or disrespected. There may be other times where I have been treated fairly... except I feel I am not as welcomed or am part of a community that just makes me feel bitter inside. Those are times when I decide to exclude myself from a community I thought I was a good part of.

Who or What Do We Want to Move On From?

Almost anyone or any community is eligible for wanting to move on from. To some individuals, certain peers, office workers, even family members are the ones people want to move on from when things are going foul. Peers can be one of the most common types you want to try to distance yourself from if you feel you do not belong anymore with certain people. Family members can be tougher to want to move on from. After all, family is very personal. So literally anyone is fair game for wanting to move on from.

When Should You Move On From Others?

If you are part of a community or are around someone who you think you can no longer connect with, it is then time to move on. You are better served meeting and being with people who help extend good times and good vibes rather than feeling insignificant and replaceable. Unless you have done things you know you can improve on, you are better served being in environments where you are welcomed and treated respectfully. You will not be told when to leave someone or others- you must decide for yourself when to break off ties with other people and move on from them. Certain factors and conditions will present themselves for you to want to either isolate yourself from certain people or when to completely let people go.

What to Do After Moving On From Others.

Once you make the decision to break apart ties with certain people, then begins the healing process. The first few hours and days will be tough because you will be remembering what all you had when things were going well. You even remember when times were better for you and certain people. Those memories will still be within you, but you realize you need to move on and try to maybe find more people to associate yourself with.

If you can, you may even want to express WHY you decided to move on from other people, especially if the ones in question are attentive and understanding. Just respectfully tell someone why you chose to move on if it is possible certain individuals are attentive enough. This at least shows the heart you have and why you chose to do move on. Most of the time, people who no longer like you or you no longer like could not care about you leaving them behind. At least it is good to know there is respect for wanting to move on if you have a chance to express why you chose to want to move on from others.


I will make some final thoughts on this topic now.

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Time to Move On: Final Thoughts

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Being involved with specific people and specific communities help establish social connections and make you feel loved and respected. Though there are times where we feel we need to move on from such communities, especially when we feel disrespected and no longer welcomed. People in your live will come and go. You are not eternally tied to certain individuals. If you feel disrespected and want to move on from certain communities you once felt you were a fixture of, you will need to move on and try to find people you feel happier with. Nobody will tell you to move on. This is something that comes with personal thought and with proper evaluation. The initial sting after leaving someone or a community will be of remembering the times you had when things went well. What you need to do is realize you are not going to make the best decisions or do the best things. Some things just don't work out the way you want them to. Some people just don't fully understand your motives if you felt you done a community wrong. It is human nature.

Unless there are things you can change, just realize that as much as you can be a fixture of someone or a community, you are equally as much a possibility of being unwanted and unloved by that same person or that same community. So make sure to connect with people who make you happy and where you feel welcomed and respected. Leave behind those who you feel you can not connect with or no longer connect with. We all deserve to meet and love people who share like interests and feel happiest with. However, if there is a person or community ends up making you feel like you no longer want to associate yourself with someone, it is best to move on and get your life straight. Moving on from others can a classic case of "addition by subtraction." But again- it is up to you to decide when to move on from others based on evaluation and thought.





I hope you found something useful regarding the advice in this topic. "John's Life Space" is all about various life issues and offering my own advice to help others live better. I want to help my visitors and readers feel better about themselves and living life. I may not always succeed, but I do what I can to offer something different from the usual negative energy cyberspace can provide. I am glad you can find my blog here. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my official website at johnbmarine.com, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin!
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Cracked Mirror, Clear Reflection

Julie Barbera's "Cracked Mirror, Clear Reflection: Shatter an Illusion of Perfection" is a book about trying to live our best lives without being fixated on perfection. If the Barbera surname sounds familiar to my readers, that is because Julie is singer Amy Barbera's sister. This blog post features her book released in September 2019. It has garnered positive reviews from many people. What do I think about it, though? Find out in this blog post!

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Cracked Mirror, Clear Reflection

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Let's talk about this book!


^ from: (Amazon) - Want to take that bold step but perfection and the need to be perfect getting in your way? This book might help you defeat the desire to be perfect and take that big step in your life!

Back in September 2019, I decided to take advantage of getting "Cracked Mirror, Clear Reflection: Shatter an Illusion of Perfection" offered for free on Amazon then and give it a read. I do not consider myself a good reader or a good writer. Despite this, I felt it was best to try this book out. I am going to try to explain my reading experience here while being careful not to spoil certain details of this motivational book. I began developing this blog post back in September 2019, but I never got to read all of the book any quicker. So it is now March 2020 as I finally prepared a review for this book after reading it more often.

Julie Barbera is a motivational speaker who is behind the initiative known as "InspireU2Action." Outside of her initiative, she has developed this book to help motivate people into action. This book hopes to get people to take bold steps while not being intimidated by being perfect. This is now my moment to talk about this book.

Lessons and Moments.

When you think of a mirror, you think of seeing a reflection of something. An eye-opening moment of Julie Barbera's past has given her memories of her former self as a teenager. The book goes into detail about the many thoughts and experiences of hers going from teenager to adult to mother. Each experience leads up to slowly getting a major point across. Even when a chapter or an experience seems like rambling, everything eventually happens for a reason, and you can learn from Julie's experiences as to why she mentioned such items and what to learn from them.

This book also makes mentions of perfection. When we want to do something, we are most satisfied when we do things to perfection or near perfection. Wanting to achieve perfection is a key element of success to almost all of us. However, at what expense do you take into account to achieve this perfection? Also, do you let perfection get in the way of trying to accomplish your goals? These are all things to take into consideration as this book progresses.

The expressed points come in the form of various experiences, and it also features religious references including verses from the Holy Bible to help further express certain points and to provide thoughts. So you get a little of everything as you read along with Julie's experiences. Once done with the main portions of the book, some extra thoughts and extra bits of motivation follow.

Book Impressions.

From mostly reading "Cracked Mirror, Clear Reflection," the main sort of idea expressed here is on Julie Barbera wanting to make a big leap, but hesitates fearing her best won't be good enough to truly accomplish what she wants. Or perhaps Julie fears perfection is the best way to accomplish something, and so this further hampers her ability to accomplish whatever she wants. It is as if perfection is a monster that has to be slain to accomplish anything. Most of the time, we see perfection as a goal, while Julie sees it mostly as a monster. Julie even makes mention of imperfections among all of us, and that it is okay to be imperfect... even slightly imperfect. This is very much something I can relate to. That's why I was able to relate to what all Julie has produced in her book. There are times when even I am afraid to take that step because of having various other thoughts racing in my mind preventing me from simply trying to make any sort of dreams of mine become reality.

For these reasons alone, I think this should be the book for you to read if you want to make yourself a better person but can't motivate yourself enough to take a needed stand. Or maybe you want to take that next step, but feel perfection and the need to be perfect standing in your way. The person who wants to improve his/her life but needs some sort of push to make it happen can benefit from reading this book. This book also benefits those who are so focused on perfection in what we do instead of simply doing things as best as we can. I would say Julie would favor simply doing something rather than doing something to perfection.

On top of this, Julie Barbera also tends to make multiple notions of trying not to confuse dreams with reality. More often than not do we tend to simply live life rather than always chase perfection. People have so much potential in this world, yet we let our own images and aspirations of perfection get in the way of trying to make those valuable next steps in life. So this book does a great job of helping ease the flow between realizing our dreams and motivation to take that next step while not heavily focusing on perfection. None of us will ever be perfect at everything we do. We will stumble. We will fail. Perfection, though, should not stand in the way of getting what we want and trying to make critical next steps in our lives.


Now for some final thoughts.

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"Cracked Mirror, Clear Reflection" Final Thoughts

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"Cracked Mirror, Clear Reflection: Shatter an Illusion of Perfection" is a quality piece of motivational material from Julie Barbera. I would recommend this book especially to people who can not take that leap of faith or go "all in" on life because of the desire to be perfect in taking such huge steps. This is the book for those who want to make their dreams come true yet get held back because of the fear or failure or the desire to be perfect. This book is about shattering that image of perfection in trying to better our lives. One could say perfection is the biggest enemy and hindrance of ourselves living our best lives. This book tells you that while perfection may be our ultimate goal when going through life and making big decisions, it should not be the biggest factor or level of success we should achieve.

I say I would recommend this book. Great job by Julie Barbera for coming up with such a quality book!

Resources.

If you would like to gauge Julie's book, look at these resources below to get your copy in hard form or digital:



Or learn more about Julie Barbera and her "InspireU2Action" program by visiting www.inspireu2action.com.

Speaking of perfection, I blogged about perfection recently on "John's Life Space." You can read more about that here: "Perfectionism" (John's Life Space)


Thank you for supporting my work any way you can.





I hope you enjoyed my material. Remember to stay tuned to this blog to see more life issue topics that I have to share with the world. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

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Virus Outbreaks

Any health epidemic can really impact your life and others. The recent Coronavirus/COVID-19 has gotten me to discuss virus outbreaks on "John's Life Space." These moments can impact people as well as entities and events. I can't help defeat any sort of virus outbreak, but I can try to raise awareness and offer some helpful material. So welcome one and all to "John's Life Space!"

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Virus Outbreaks

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Virus outbreaks have impacted civilization for centuries. So while something like Coronavirus/COVID-19 is new, it hasn't been the only ever virus outbreak. Vaccines will be needed to try to treat (and potentially cure) certain virus outbreaks. Preventing viruses from spreading will require lots of extra measures.

Various virus outbreaks have impacted human life for centuries. You can think all the way back to the Black Plague (also called "Black Death") in the 14th Century. Other viral threats include SARS, Mad Cow, Ebola, Zika, and others. Each of the different virus outbreaks have made their impact to human life as well as potential hurt to companies and entertainment functions. People try to develop vaccines to prevent the spread of such viruses and treat (or even cure) those who test positive for such horrible viruses. Preventative measures can be taken to help stay safe from virus outbreaks.

Impacts of a Virus Outbreak.

The obvious impact of any kind of virus outbreak is an overall impact on the health of others. Such conditions can impact the overall health of various individuals until they start developing symptoms that make them vulnerable. People who are students may have to take online courses to prevent getting out in the open. People who work may have to work from home and through cyberspace. Anything to try to prevent open distribution of any virus outbreak is often done to help others.

Outside of human health, companies and entertainment events also suffer. Various companies may lose money due to not as much involvement or potential cancellation of various shows and conventions. For example, events such as SXSW (South by Southwest) and E3 (Electronics Entertainment Expo) were cancelled in 2020 because of the Coronavirus. It was also reported that the NCAA basketball tournaments would be played with no fans in the stands. The impacts of such health outbreaks can drastically impact companies and events, leading even to financial impacts because of lost money.

From these points, virus outbreaks can hurt lots of entities in various ways.

What Can You Do in the Event of a Virus Outbreak?

If caught in a situation of a virus outbreak, make sure to heed all warnings and take precautions to protect yourself and your loved ones. Be concerned; just make sure not to be frantically concerned unless the situation becomes severe. Also remember to do the common sense things to help prevent the spread of disease- such as washing your hands and practicing proper hygiene.


It is okay to be concerned about all of this. I am concerned myself to be honest. However, life goes on, and we still can help ourselves and others to potentially defeat virus outbreaks such as Coronavirus/COVID-19. So just do all you can to take care of yourself. If you feel sick, get yourself some medical attention quickly.





I want all of you to please be careful in the wake of ANY virus outbreak, let alone Coronavirus/COVID-19. I did what I can to bring this issue to light in my life issues blog. Hopefully this will help all of you in the wake of such deals. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

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Perfectionism

Perfection is about being best of the best. To some people, perfection is the ONLY way to accomplish something. Some people can not live with being less than perfect. People will make mistakes. It is how people deal with perfection that make us who we are and how we deal with things when they are less than perfect. Can you live with failure? Can you live with your mistakes? Some can; others can not. So this blog post has to do with perfection.

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Perfection

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What is perfect? To many, perfect means you do something to where nothing can be done wrong and that it is completely foolproof. It means you have done everything to where there is no fault or dispute. It is as if no wrong can be done. While perfect is what many people want out of life, not many can live with making mistakes. Perfection can take you only so far. One can become fixated to perfection to where the thought of potential failure is out of the mindset of most people. At that point, one may have already failed if one only looks at being perfect and successful. It is this one-track mindset that defeats most people before they even endure failure. It is also important to note that what people consider perfect varies from person to person. If you look at perfection like sports, a team that finishes undefeated all the way to a championship or simply an undefeated season is perfect. A team that has never trailed in any game or season can be considered perfect.

Being a Perfectionist.

Most people can't live with making mistakes or being seen as a mistake. So a perfectionist tries to make the most of everything to where there are no faults whatsoever. Everything has to be done in a way to where few or no mistakes are present. Things that are perfect have no faults of any kind. To accomplish this, one has to focus on trying not to fail. Sometimes, someone may be nearing perfection without even knowing or acknowledging it. As another sports example, a Perfect Game in baseball or softball is where a pitcher records Outs against all of the opposing batters without issuing a walk (or base on balls). If a Walk is issued in a Perfect Game attempt, the Perfect Game ends and is now playing for a No-Hitter. Perfection and perfection attempts come in many forms and entail a number of factors.

Alright- I will admit. I am a perfectionist myself. I focus too much on trying to make everything as perfect as possible, or I feel under pressure to make sure everything is done properly. Even I have made countless mistakes that I am either aware of or may not be aware of. I still do everything to the best of my ability because I know what I am capable of and what I want out of anything I put my mind to.

Since I mentioned this ad nauseam, let me get to the next talking point...

Can You Live With Not Being Perfect?

Let us say your pursuit of perfection falls short. Can you live with yourself, or do you consistently lament missing out on historical greatness? Your own passion and dedication determine if you feel perfection is the way to go. You may even find your inability to do things perfectly makes you a failure. Even the most successful entities have stumbled. You can't be perfect all the time. Living with some sort of blemish on your talent can take its toll on you. Understandably, while mistakes will be made, we become disappointed. The real issue is in trying to not be too fixated on perfection.


Now for some final thoughts.

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Perfection: Final Thoughts

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Focus more on doing things as best as you can rather than chase perfection. Sure, perfection will make you better regarded and better respected, but countless people have committed and been involved in various failing moments. Do not be afraid to accept or admit failure. Just make sure to rebound proper for the future. Perfection will only stress you in trying to always do things to where they can go no wrong. Do not put yourself under any unnecessary pressure to be perfect.





That's all. Thank you for visiting "John's Life Space!"

What are your thoughts regarding perfection?

I would love for you to Subscribe/Follow my work if you enjoyed my blogging material if you haven't connected already. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

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Helicopter Parenting

It is natural for a loving parent to be concerned about his/her child(ren). Sometimes, a parent can seem too protective or always wanting to check on a sibling. Constant and aggressive overlooking is called "helicopter parenting," and placing so much control over a sibling's life can damage them in the long run. This blog post explains what helicopter parenting is and how it affects the lives of children.

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Helicopter Parenting

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So what is being a "helicopter" parent? I'll explain in this blog post.


^ from: (Psychology Today) - It is okay to constantly be concerned about your children, but be careful not to be a helicopter parent to your children.

There is nothing wrong with a concerned loving parent checking on his/her child(ren). The problem at times, though, is when a parent always seem to shadow children. The feeling is similar to a helicopter hovering over someone or something. When a news report or a traffic report is on television, you usually see helicopter views of the scene. You hear and see the helicopter hover over the scene So is the namesake of "helicopter parenting." Helicopter parenting is defined as a form of parenting where you always seem to overlook your children in almost every situation. A pitfall of helicopter parenting is that it disallows a child to really learn on one's own and live his/her own life. This is all a matter of being overprotective and a bit of an invasion of privacy. Children WILL make mistakes in their lives and do things they think are right or acceptable. In the development of a child's life, they must be able to make mistakes and learn from them. As much as a child learning right from wrong is important in their development, having a certain level of involvement and concern is equally a part of a child's development.

Video Insight.

Here is some video insight on what helicopter parenting can do to children. Namely in this video, to teenagers. Take a look:


^ 5 Ways Helicopter Parents Can Affect You

Helicopter Parenting: Where Do You Draw the Line?

You do not want to constantly overlook your children to where they basically can not have their own private lives. If a child's privacy is invaded by parents, a child is unable to make his/her own choices and live his/her own life. Please note the main idea of this topic is not about whether or not you should be concerned about your children. If you are a loving and caring parent, then you obviously are concerned about your children and all that goes on in the life of your child(ren). It helps to let children have their privacy and live their lives as they choose. Only intervene in the sense of emergency or in some kind of concerning moment.

Helicopter Parenting: Final Thoughts.

While it is okay for a parent to constantly be concerned about your child(ren), being a helicopter parent can be damaging to a child's life. You have to allow for a child to have one's own privacy and live one's own life. You can still be a part of a child's life; just realize the child has some sort of privacy that must be respected. Child or children should also be able to make their own decisions in life for better or worse. A child should be able to take on certain life challenges and learn from them if/when a child makes a wrong decision or has a troublesome experience. A parent has every right to be concerned constantly. Just make sure not to be TOO involved in the decisions made by children, because the long-term effects can impact a child for the rest of his/her life. Take these things into consideration as a parent, and make sure to allow your child(ren) to live life as they can without too much restriction or restraint.





Hopefully this blog post and its subject matter is something you can relate to. Whether or not you find helicopter parenting to be good or bad is entirely your call. Be sure to read my many other blog posts and look at my Helpful Resoruces if you want some extra insight on many different things in life. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

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Birthday Blues

(UPDATED: November 3, 2021)

Celebrating a birthday should be fun and enjoyable. After all- you have lived another year of your life and are ready to start a new one at a higher age! Some people, though, feel sad (or at least nervous) at celebrating another birthday. This is what we like to call having the "birthday blues." The "birthday blues" can be enough to bring someone down in an occasion that should be rather fun and festive.

January 15 is my own birthday! So while I am awaiting my actual birthday to come, I figured I'd blog about the birthday blues here.

LATEST UPDATE(S)/REVISION(S):

NOV 3 2021 - added extra resource

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Birthday Blues

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I want to set the mood with a picture.



^ from: sovcal.com - Birthdays are supposed to be joyous occasions, but they can sometimes depress people.

A birthday is a joyous occasion to take part in. One's birthday should be a celebration of living a full year and starting a new one. Especially any birthday where you can finally take on newer responsibilities should be embraced. For example, turning 18 or 21 in the United States allows you certain extra freedoms. Young ladies in Latin cultures who celebrate quinceañeras also have something special to celebrate.

By these things, a birthday should be an enjoyable occasion. However, they are not as joyous for some people. It is a weird case involving birthdays. For one thing, being older means you are able to enjoy certain freedoms; but on the other hand, being older just makes you feel older and make you miss what freedoms you had when you were younger. Some older people end up feel sad about being young and youthful. Some older people even feel sad about birthdays because they do not know how much longer they have to live. It is almost to say that each birthday makes some feel like the end of their lives just inch closer and closer. We all know we can't live forever. Something like birthdays can make us feel older than we actually are.

One of the reasons why people often dread birthdays is because some look back on their lives and feel disappointed they haven't accomplished too much at their previous age. Maybe some others wish they accomplished more at a younger age when a birthday happens. There is still a lot to be desired as people get older. If someone has the birthday blues feeling bad about not accomplishing certain things at a younger age, it may be possible to motivate someone to accomplish certain things in the future that one could not accomplish in the past. Getting older may also mean pushing to do certain things like find love, move to a new location, start a new job, start a family, or anything like that. A potential pitfall to having this kind of thinking in advance of a birthday is the feeling of one is running out of time in life to enjoy certain liberties or opportunities. It means some people feel they have to "hurry up" and experience certain things before dying. This only adds extra stress to someone trying to live a great life. There are some things you probably will never get to experience that you probably could have enjoyed in the past, such as a prom or having a yearbook. You just have to move on and make due with what life you have at present.


I'll try to offer some final thoughts next.

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Birthday Blues: Final Thoughts

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While birthdays are worth celebrating, birthdays themselves do not always reflect happiness for some people who deal with the "birthday blues." Birthdays make some people feel older and further get driven away from being young and youthful. Feeling older only makes some people feel more disappointed than happy. It is great to get loving support from family and friends from when it is your birthday. Enjoy birthdays and enjoy celebrating another year of your life. Even if you are of an advanced age, you should be thankful to have lived such a long life with potentially more years to come. Newer challenges will come as you get older, but try to remain as youthful and as happy as you can be. You may need some help if you feel depressed when your birthday comes. Regardless, never lose happiness as you get older. Look at birthdays much the same way you think of the new year- it's a new year of you making the most of the next full year of your life even as you look back at your past. Having the "birthday blues" is common for when your birthday draws near, but the most important thing to remember is that you have the rest of your life ahead of you. So savor each day and never lose focus of continuing to live life the best way you can.

Resources.

If you'd like some insight as to how to beat the birthday blues, here are some links I looked up online as I was researching this topic: • Birthday Depression: 13 Ways to Beat the Birthday Blues (Medical News Today)
• Birthday Depression: 12 Ways to Conquer the Birthday Blues (Healthline)
• This is Why Birthdays Can Make People Depressed (VICE)
• Birthday Depression: Coping With the Birthday Blues


If any of you have a birthday coming up, happy [early] birthday! Or if today is your birthday proper, then happy birthday!





I hope you found this blog post helpful. I do what I can to offer something positive to the world. Be sure to take advantage of the many different topics I try to express across all of my blogs. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

Visit my official website at johnbmarine.com, subscribe to My Blog(s), and/or Follow on Bloglovin!
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