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"John's Life Space" features a variety of content to many audiences. The majority of content is meant to suit an audience 13 years of age and older. Some material offered in this blog may not be suitable for all audiences and may include some topics too sensitive or discomforting to discuss. All advice offered in this blog is not meant to replace or substitute practical help. If you require counseling or want more professional help, please consult your healthcare provider, a psychologist, or any other qualified individual.

Wednesday, September 12, 2018

Comparing Successes

John B. Marine | September 12, 2018 | | |
Everyone wants to be successful. When it comes to success, it involves your own success as well as the success of others. We often compare our success against others. A lot of times, comparing success is discouraged. That is mostly because we all have different levels of success including how we get such success. However, you do wonder how others compare in levels of success. Should you, though? This blog post is all about comparing successes.






Comparing Successes


You want to be successful, but you sometimes think about how your own success compares to others. I know there a lot of times when I hear of how some people wonder about what makes certain others so successful to begin with. As a common example, there are people who question the success of celebrities and families such as the Kardashians. I even recall some people who wonder about why some people are so successful and usually question what some are truly successful of. Is it ever okay to question success or wonder how your success compares to others? To discuss success comparisons proper, here are some talking points to get the discussion going.


Comparing Successes: Examples.

When I got my Associate's in the Arts at age 25 in 2008, I felt a bit miffed that most people my age would be further along in life than I have been I got my Associate's in the Arts. There are two sides to all of this. One side is that maybe I could have done better if I had better times in school and in life. Conversely, there are probably 25 year olds who may take longer to get to where I was or have never even enrolled in college. I can take this example further by saying that people at my age of 25 then probably are married, have children, and even living on their own.

Sometimes comparing success can also be like playing certain games. For example, you may have unlocked certain levels or characters while you are stuck somewhere 25% or 50% complete in the game. Everyone is different. There are surely a lot of games where I haven't unlocked as much content or accomplished certain things others can only dream of.

The most common comparison of success can usually be found in sports. People often compare stats and levels of success of teams and athletes. People may usually compare success the likes of (for example) LeBron James vs. Michael Jordan. Or maybe comparisons among teams could be like comparing the likes of the St. Louis Cardinals or New York Yankees of Major League Baseball. Even sports has its own comparisons of varying levels of success.

In cases like these, should people be ashamed that they don't have levels of success like others do? That is a feeling you are left with if you feel that your own success pales in comparison to what others in the same or similar fields have accomplished. It is making life an unnecessary competition in many cases.


Comparing Successes: Control What Only You Can Control!

Part of living life is about doing what you can take advantage of and worrying only about your own status. The problem is that we still think about trying to reach success as quickly and as impactful as possible. You sometimes have those, "if I could do it all over again..." conversations you respond to. You wish you maybe were in a better place or did certain things at a younger age. Thing is, you live only one life and have to make the most of what you have. You learn your lessons and apply what you learned to the future and with future generations.


Is Comparing Successes Okay?

Is it really okay to compare your success against others? Really, I think you should be blessed you've achieved success. Be thankful you've reached a level of personal happiness most people wished they can reach. While your own success is great, life shouldn't be a competition of who can be the most successful. If you have reached success you're happy with, you shouldn't try to rub in your own success when looking at others. It also helps not to feel like you have to be successful earlier in life as opposed to later in life. That topic, however, will require its own blog post. Thing is... just enjoy reaching success and making the most of what you have.

You want to be successful, but you do not want to make a habit of comparing your success with others. Success will come; just don't feel like you have to emulate someone else's success to be personally happy. Worry about trying to be a success on your own terms and through your own experiences. Don't try to compete with someone else with his/her own success level.


Comparing Successes: Final Thoughts.

Long story short- be as successful as you want to be, but don't go crazy trying to be the absolute best or showcase the absolute best level of success one can ever achieve. If you worry so much about other peoples' success, you feel like you can be happy only when your own success is better than what someone else's success. You feel like you can never be as successful as someone is, or at least you feel you should be more successful than other people. Enjoy success; just don't compare success to others. Your success shouldn't rely on trying to be more successful than others.




Comparing Successes: Resources


These resources will help you to realize that comparing your success to others is not a good idea. Take a look at these:

4 Steps to Stop Comparing Your Success to Others (Success Magazine)
What Happens When I Compare Myself to 'Successful' People (The Art of Charm)
The Key to Success? Not Comparing Yourself to Others (Psych Central)
Why Comparing Yourself to Others Isn't Success (Coaching for Leaders)
The Comparison Trap: How to Enjoy (and Not Envy) the Success of Others (99u)
Life's Enough: Stop Comparing Yourself to Others (zen habits)


Maybe this can help you all, as I do with many of my posts here on John's Life Space.





If you want to discuss this topic further, feel free to discuss with this question:

Do you worry so much about the success of others compared to your own?

Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.

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